by admin | 27 Dec, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
As I publish this blog, it is just two days before 2024 ends and 2025 begins. I hope you have had fabulous festivities at this time of the year, no matter how you celebrate. A new year brings a blank canvas, a fresh start, and the possibility of great things to appear for you. Just don’t forget to honour the year that is leaving. I want to encourage you, at this time, to implement the three L’s.
As I was walking out onto the fabulous new St Kilda Pier, recently completed after many years of construction, it was a stunning day. The sun was shining, the sky was blue, and the view of the water, the yachts, and the city skyline in the background was mesmerising. I walked past a man sitting on a bench, enjoying the beautiful day and the wonderful view. Maybe he was even reflecting on the three L’s.
So, what are the three L’s? The three L’s is the process to take the nuggets from 2024 and allow them to help you be more alive in 2025. The first L is ‘Learn’, the second L is ‘Let go’, and the third L is ‘Launch’. It is a tragedy that so many people say, I can’t wait for this year to be over, next year will be better. My question is, will it? How will it be better? Why will it be better? What does better look like? Simply waiting for the year to end and then hoping, by some miracle, the new year will be better is a little like hoping you will wake up tomorrow with a six pack, a blissful relationship, and a million dollars in the bank, when today you are overweight, alone, and broke.
If this is how you normally approach a new year, then I want to encourage you to try something that may actually increase your chances of having those things you want, without hoping for a genie in a bottle to grant you three wishes. You don’t need three wishes, you just need the three L’s. You need to learn from 2024, you need to let go of the things that are not serving you, and you need to launch into 2025 with a plan, and a commitment to follow that plan and do whatever you need to do to make it a year you will be proud of.
Learn. There is a wonderful saying that, things don’t happen to you, they happen for you. As you reflect on 2024, there may be things that happened, things you did, or things you didn’t do, that cause pain for you to think about. If, however, you truly believed that things happen for you, then there is something to learn from each and every experience you can use, and then make 2025 a better year. Find your spot, whether that is on a bench looking at the view, or in your home, to write down everything that will provide an opportunity to learn from.
Yes, it may be uncomfortable, but it will also be transformational. Write down all of the adverse situations, poor choices, mistakes, and conflicts. Write down all of the great things, the achievements, and the fabulous interactions. Then reflect on what you can learn from each of them. What can you learn from the poor choices to ensure you don’t repeat them? What can you learn from the great things, so they happen again and again? Let me tell you, I have a long list of things I am committed to learning from in 2024. How about you?
Let Go. As uncomfortable as the reflecting and learning stage is, I believe the letting go phase can be even more challenging. My biggest challenge in life is that I love hanging onto my flaws, my faults, my poor choices, and beating myself up for far too long. It does no good, and it will prevent any change in 2025, unless you and I choose to let go of all the stuff that is not serving us. I know this from painful experience. People suggest that letting go is a hard thing to do. If that is the case, imagine you have just picked up a hot cup of coffee and your fingers are now burning. What would you do? Would you keep holding it as your fingers start to blister with heat and pain, or would you put it on the table and let it go? It’s an easy thing to do, right? So, why don’t you do the same with other things that you are hanging onto that are burning your heart?
Launch. I will keep this one brief. If you have done the first two steps, you will find this one easier. Think about how you want things to be and write it down. Find a mentor, if you need to, and create an action plan. Then, simply launch into a realistic and consistent action process, with regular review and reflection times, to make 2025 your best year yet.
In my amazing podcast this week with Van Marinos, called Start with exercise, we discuss how many challenges and new beginnings can be much easier to manage when we start moving our bodies. Maybe that is your first step in 2025. As we see out 2024, please don’t waste it. It is full of gems that are incredibly valuable if you can learn from them, let go what needs to be let go of, and launch into 2025 with joy and clarity. Apply the three L’s today.
by admin | 21 Dec, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
The most valuable resource we have on this planet is energy. Many people suggest time is the most valuable resource, but my thinking is, that if you don’t have energy, what are you going to do with that time? As a human race we are always looking for more energy to run our homes, our cars, our computers, and our lives. The most important energy we need is to run ourselves. What if there was a simple way to flick the energy switch to create abundant energy?
Have you ever said to yourself; I am so tired, I wish I had more energy, I am exhausted, I don’t have the energy for that, or some other similar thing? We seem to always be looking for that quick energy hit, and many rely on caffeine, sugar, energy drinks, or other synthetic solutions, which may work for a moment, but leaves people lagging again in a very short time. We all know that eating well, regular exercise, and quality sleep are critical if we want optimal energy, don’t we? What if there was an even better way to flick the energy switch?
I was feeling flat on Wednesday. There were some challenging things happening, and despite the fact that I had slept well the night before, exercised in the morning, as I always do, and eaten like a champion, I was still flagging in the mid-afternoon. I was driving into the city to help with the Xmas dinner and celebration for the homeless in Melbourne, and I was really questioning whether I had the energy or desire to be there. It was only because of the commitment to my friend Kate that I decided to go. I got out of my car at just after 3pm struggling, and I got home at about 8:30pm bouncing out of my skin, with energy to burn, and I hadn’t consumed anything in that time. How did that happen?
In fact, it was in a heartbeat I went from zero to hero from an energy standpoint. I walked in, and immediately my mind was off me and my problems, and on making it a wonderful experience for the homeless that would be in attendance that evening. The energy switch was flicked. It was full on from word go as we were preparing food, dragging trestle tables and chairs out to the car park area (where the dinner would be), co-ordinating gifts and strategies to distribute them, helping the music team set up, welcoming people, singing Christmas carols, feeding about 100 or so people, distributing stuff, and so on. It was relentless but energy giving, because we were doing things for others who really valued and appreciated what was being done for them.
Then came the clean-up, and by 7:30pm most of it was done, but there were about 20 or 30 loaves of bread, and about 50 oranges left over. What would we do with them? The thought was we would have to throw them away, but I said, I will take them. So, I packed them into about five bags, loaded them into my car and headed home. No, not to eat them all. There are many homeless people in the suburb I live, so as soon as I got home, still with energy to burn, I took those bags of bread and oranges around the streets and gave them to many homeless people, who were incredibly grateful.
I finally got home about 8:30pm and I was still buzzing with energy and joy. I had not eaten in more than 6 hours, I had no caffeine, no sugar, and no artificial energy enhancer. I was buzzing with the most amazing energy that we, as humans, can ever tap into. It was the energy that comes from giving love, support, service, and kindness to others who are receptive to receive. When we give to these people, we immediately flick the switch and turn on a source of energy that will keep moving us in the direction of purpose, joy and meaning in life.
In my podcast this week called, Freedom is a choice, I speak with a lady full of the most incredible energy, Marleen Mour. After struggling with self-worth, poor health, and lethargy, she has now refocussed on the impact she can and will have on many other people. This is an incredible conversation about choosing to break free from the things holding us back in life. You will be totally inspired by Marleen.
As I publish this blog, it is just a few days before Christmas 2024 and many people are running on empty. How about you? There are people, right now, who are struggling, and will benefit immensely from a kind word, a hand up, a handout, a hug, or just the space to be seen and heard. I want to encourage you to try this today. Give to someone and see how it immediately flicks your energy switch.
Have a beautiful holiday season and thank you for being in my life.
by admin | 14 Dec, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
What stops most people from really exploring their potential, pursuing possibility, and fulfilling their destiny? It is not what most think it is. It is not lack of talent, ability, or intellect. It is not challenging circumstances or adverse situations. It is not other people’s opinions. It is not bad luck or poor timing. It is not the weather or any other external influence. It is 100% our thinking. Yes, I hate that also as it makes me 100% responsible. The biggest excuse we have allowed ourselves to start using these days, to effectively stop us in our tracks, is the catchy, but totally irrelevant and inaccurate ‘Imposter Syndrome’. So, let’s examine it, shall we?
I have used the term ‘Imposter Syndrome’ about myself, without really understanding what it means. As you know – or will know in about 3 seconds – our language and self-talk, and the words we use will shape and determine the life we live. The late great Skip Ross calls it the principle of command and states, everything you speak out of your mouth will happen, so be careful what you say. Gilbert Enoka, mental skills coach for the All-Blacks, says, you will never rise above the opinion you have of yourself. These are two men with incredible success, track record, and wisdom. I believe them. That being the case, we need to be very careful what words we choose.
If we look at a definition of ‘Imposter syndrome’, it is a feeling of inadequacy and self-doubt despite one’s achievements and success. However, when we look at the definition of the word ‘imposter’ we get; a person who pretends to be someone else in order to deceive others. I think we can all agree there is a large discrepancy between these two definitions which contain the same word.
I know of many times in my life where I would have described myself as having imposter syndrome. Starting out as a professional footballer, and many times through that seven-year journey, being a business owner, becoming an author, and many other times in my life. However, looking at the definition of imposter, I never deliberately pretended to be someone else to deceive others. I did feel inadequate, and I did doubt myself and my abilities because I had another type of syndrome. It’s called ‘Human Being Syndrome’.
Guess who else has ‘Human Being Syndrome’? Every single human being that is upright and looking down at the grass. If you doubt yourself, you are not an imposter, you are a human, so celebrate. If you feel inadequate at times, you are not deceitful, you are a human being, so rejoice. If you have negative self-talk at times, you are not broken, you are a human being, so jump for joy. Isn’t that great news? Every human being’s adventure is simply to validate and navigate these feelings and find ways to push past them anyway.
So, the first step on this journey is to stop referring to what you have as ‘imposter syndrome’, because in most cases you are not pretending, and you are not deceiving. Then replace it with the more accurate, and compassionate, ‘human being syndrome’. The second step is to get excited when you feel ‘human being syndrome’ starts to take effect. That means you may start to feel anxiety, fear, doubt, or inadequacy. Yes, I did say get excited. Why? Because it means you are on the verge of a breakthrough, if you simply have the courage to take the next step with faith.
These feelings indicate you are at the edge of your comfort zone, otherwise there would be no doubt or fear. So, my friend, take the step outside of your comfort zone, and you will see it is not so scary. At the same time, you will be expanding your comfort zone to include in it more amazing things for yourself and your life. In my podcast this week called Chocolate bar life, I speak with the fabulous Danielle Colley. We discuss many things, but one key point is about embracing who you are and taking simple steps every day to enhance your human experience.
I am in the process of writing a book called The Redefinition Effect, and I feel like ‘Imposter Syndrome’ is a term that definitely needs re-definition and re-interpretation. As we examine the term, it is actually a very damaging one as it suggests that if we feel doubt, fear, anxiety, and inadequacy, we are pretending and deceiving. We have determined that, in fact, it means we are human. So, enjoy your life, embrace the ‘human being syndrome’ and take the step boldly across your comfort zone and into your fabulous zone.
by admin | 7 Dec, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Are you ready for the best advice I ever got to simplify, focus, and move my life forward in the quickest and most effective way? I am hearing a big ‘YES’. We live in a world that is busy, noisy, and distracting. So many options, so many opinions, and so many things that can keep us stuck in a place of confusion and overwhelm. When I was weighing up my options, wondering the best path, negotiating all the choices available to me, the best advice I ever got was to make the decision once.
Let me give you a little of my African animal knowledge as it will help illustrate my point. The big cats are hunting machines and rely on their ability to focus and remove distractions to catch prey and survive. No amount of speed, agility, and strength can help them if they don’t make a decision just once. What do I mean? You may believe that a big cat approaching a herd of hundreds of deer has a smorgasbord of options, and it does. However, it could miss out altogether without one clear decision. Once the deer are aware there is danger, they will all start running and moving in different directions. They do this to confuse the hunter.
If the big cat doesn’t decide on just one deer, it will be distracted by all of the movement and may miss out altogether. So, it must fix its eyes and attention on just one deer and decide, just once, it is the target. If it picks one, and then sees another one closer and changes target, it will miss out. When it focuses and decides on just one, it is no longer distracted by all the other movement and will, in most cases, catch its prey. All it had to do is make the decision once.
So, how does this apply to us? I don’t know about you, but I have spent too much of my life double-minded and second-guessing myself and my choices. The moment I decided, just once, that I would commit to a course of action, not only did it simplify my life, remove the noise, but things started changing for the better. Until we make that decision, life will always be complicated, and we will stay stuck.
Have you ever wanted to start a fitness regime and thought that getting out of bed and going for a walk or run each morning would help? If you haven’t committed to that decision just once, you will wake up each morning trying to decide whether you will get up or not. In most cases, if like most people, you will hit ‘snooze’ and roll over and go back to sleep. If you are anything like me, I rarely feel like getting up in the morning to exercise, but I do it anyway. Why? Because I decided just once that I would do it every day. I infrequently feel like reading before bed, making calls for prospective business, or writing each day. Yet, I do these things every day. Because I made the decision just once that I would.
It is so freeing not to have to negotiate and decide each time if I am going to do these things or not. Making the decision once on a course of behaviour has led me to amazing routines and wonderful blessings in my life and will do the same for you if you decide just once. So, what is it for you? Is it exercise? Is it eating breakfast? Is it listening to an audio a day? Is it scheduled time with your children? Is it meeting a new person each day? Is it complimenting 5 people per day? Is it writing for 10 mins per day? Is it meditating each day? What is it you can decide just once that you will do every day. Pick one thing, decide once, and watch how your life seems easier and gets better.
In my podcast this week called Embody your potential, I speak with Emily Chidiac. After a childhood of abuse, trauma and self-loathing, Emily finally made the decision, just once, that she was worthy and would embody the potential she believed she had inside her. The moment she decided, things changed for her in a big way. Her story is powerful and inspiring.
Life is challenging and confusing enough without us making it harder for ourselves. When it comes to things that are most important and will have the greatest impact on the person you are and the life you will live, make the decision just once to do what you know you need to do. Then enjoy the amazing things that appear in your life.
by admin | 29 Nov, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Wellness
Of all the things we humans want in life, I believe there is one thing that, for the majority of us, is most important. Yes, we want money, yes, we want success, yes, we want the car and the house, but I am learning more and more each day that what we want even more is a feeling of belonging. I know that is true for me. What I have also learned is that if I want to feel I belong, it is not just up to others to open their arms to me, I have a responsibility as well. Belonging is a two-way street.
There have been so many things presenting themselves to me over the last month or so that have highlighted the powerful need for belonging. Most recently over the last week or so. Last Friday night a group of men got together who had played football and connected together many decades earlier. This was an amazing opportunity to catch up and reconnect. What astounded me was a group of guys, I loved playing and being with, admitted that they never really felt part of the club. They never really felt they belonged. This was so jaw-dropping for me, because I always felt they were a strong part of the club and the culture, yet they didn’t feel the same way. I wondered what I could and should have done to help them feel they belonged.
It got me thinking about my own experiences as a player at the professional football club I was at for seven years earlier in my career. I felt the same. I never really felt that I belonged or was a valued member of the club. This was reinforced to me when I found out that I had been de-listed by reading it in the newspaper. When I have ever verbalised this to guys I played with, they, like I was last Friday, were surprised as they believed I was a valuable part of the fabric of the club. Again, my thoughts went to, how can clubs and groups do more to help every person feel valued and that they belong.
Then, last Sunday at Church, I was given another perspective on belonging. There was a group of people sitting enjoying some food and fellowship after the service when the senior pastor spoke about belonging. He said how important it was to create an environment that helps people feel valued and that they belong, but he also said something I had not ever considered. He said for a person to feel like they belong to any group, they must be actively engaged in that group and not just rely on others to feel they belong. In other words, it’s not just about others making us feel we belong, it is also very much about us making the effort and taking responsibility for our own feeling of belonging.
As I reflect on my time when I haven’t felt like I belonged, I had often held back and just waited for others to include me and help me feel valued. I didn’t step up to belong, I waited to be asked. If I had arrived believing I was worthy and a valuable part of the group, I know I would have been received the same way and that feeling of belonging would have been there. And if not, I would have known I was with the wrong crowd. It was a powerful lesson I learned at church. If I want to belong, as well as helping others feel they belong, I need to step up and take responsibility for my own belonging.
My podcast this week is called Crazy optimism, with Matt O’Neill. After growing up in a family in which he never felt good enough and never felt he belonged, he made a decision to shift his mindset. As a result, he gave himself the gift of belonging, the blessing of crazy optimism, and has now created a life for himself and his family that he loves. This is a powerful podcast I urge you to listen to.
How are you feeling at the moment? There is far too much loneliness and disconnectedness in this world, and it is causing problems that can be avoided if we just felt as if we belonged. If this is you, let me share something, you do belong. You belong to a family, you belong to a community, you belong to this world, and you are worthy. Belonging starts with you, stepping up and making yourself available to be a valuable part of a group. Whilst we do need others to help us feel valued, belonging is definitely a two-way street.
by admin | 23 Nov, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
I am very passionate about the power of our thoughts and our focus. In fact, I wrote a blog about just that last week. I am on a roll right now, so I will just continue on with the theme this week. A key theme. The sad reality is that so many people are not conscious of their thinking, and as a result very easily spiral into the basement of their mind. Trust me, the basement of your mind is not where you want to be, you want to move and have upper floor thinking.
Do you have a basement? Have you ever been in a basement? In my experience they are dark, smelly, damp, and have some creatures living there I really don’t want to bump into. Sometimes we need to go to the basement to get something or store something, but then we probably want to get out of there as quickly as possible, right? It is much more enjoyable on the upper floors. It is lighter, brighter, and may even have some beautiful views over the surrounding area. Would it be fair to say we would rather be on the upper floors than down in the basement? I think so. The same can be said about our thinking. So often we allow it to slide down into the basement when with a simple and deliberate shift, we can be on the upper floors enjoying the exquisite views.
So, what do I mean? If I am being honest, and I want to be honest with you, I was in the basement with my thinking this morning. I went out last night and had a great time reconnecting with some amazing men but went to bed much later than is normal for me these days. I woke up feeling less than optimal. Despite not much sleep, I got out of bed and completed my exercise regime, feeling less than optimal. Then I thought to myself, Oh, I have to write my blog this morning, and I don’t know if I can be bothered. Basement thinking. Why? I said to myself, I have to write my blog, like it is a chore or something unenjoyable that must be done. Thankfully these days, I am very quick to notice my basement thinking, and I thought, I don’t have to write this at all, I choose to write it, I get to write it, and I am privileged to write it. So, here I am now, on the upper floor, writing my blog with joy and with the greatest desire that you will read it, apply it, and it will help you in your life.
I hope you will be conscious when your thinking slides into the basement, and how simple it is to get it to the upper floors where it can empower you and help you create amazing outcomes in your life. The upper floor analogy is that you see further, see more possibilities, and believe more. So, whenever you discover you are limiting yourself by your thoughts, it’s time to get in the elevator to the upper floors. When you say things like, It’s too hard, I don’t have what it takes, I am a procrastinator, I have tried before and couldn’t do it, I am tired, I am not sure I am up to it, I couldn’t be bothered, it’s too hot, too cold, too wet, too windy, or any other similar thoughts, guess where you are? Yep, firmly stuck in the basement with the stench, the damp, the mould and the rats. That’s why they call it ‘stinking thinking’. When you think this way, guess where you will stay? You don’t need me to answer that, do you?
Getting out of the basement to enjoy the view from the upper floor is actually ridiculously simple. In fact, I described it last week, but I will do it again here with three simple steps. First step is to be aware of your thoughts and identify when you are in the basement. Second step is to ask yourself, is that what I want? When you answer no, and you will, then the third step is to think about what you do want, what you can do, and what you will do. In a heartbeat, you will be out of the basement and enjoying the view from the upper floor.
Let’s say you want to regain your wellbeing, and you are thinking about what it takes, and you slide into the basement by thinking, I don’t think I have what it takes, I don’t have the will power, and will probably not achieve what I want. Yuck, talk about a stench! If you are aware of this thinking, ask yourself, is this what I want? Of course that’s not what you want, so what do you want, what can you do, and what will you do? When you answer, it may be something like this, Of course I have what it takes. I can be optimally healthy as all I have to do is take small steps each day, and I can do that. I will start with a walk each morning and eating a healthy breakfast. I can do that, and I will do that.
Can you see and feel the difference with these two very contrary thought processes? Can you also see how quickly it can change when you are aware of your basement thinking? How could you apply this to other areas of your life to get you to the upper floors? In my podcast this week called, Path to forgiveness, Katharine Giovanni and I discuss the simple choice to forgive, the steps to forgive, and how it can immediately transform your life.
I am so glad I have written this blog when I almost talked myself out of it. Just the process of writing it has helped me think about other areas of my life I need to focus on. Yay. What about you? I hope it has helped you shift your thinking from the basement and moved it up so you can enjoy the benefits of upper floor thinking.
