Struggling to soaring, in a moment

by admin | 15 Nov, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset

So, why are we struggling?

What a depressing question to start a blog with! I know. I promise, it will get way better, so please just bear with me. It is late Spring in Melbourne Australia. In fact, as happens in Melbourne, it has taken two months into Spring before it actually feels like Spring. I woke up early last Saturday morning, as I do, and I was up and exercising. It was chilly but clear. In fact, to use a well and truly under-utilised word, it was splendiferous. As the morning sun rose in the East, the day just kept on getting better. The sun was bright, the sky a deep blue – void of any clouds – the birds were singing, the runners were running, and it was a stunning morning. In fact, a stunning day.

As I was jogging home, in the midst of God’s beauty all around me, I posed this rather depressing question to myself. When we live in such a beautiful world, when we have so much potential within us, and when there is an abundance of possibility all around us, why are so many people struggling? I say we, because I include myself in this question. I feel like, because I am an author, speaker, podcaster, and mentor, I should have my stuff together. It is a tough mental battle for me at times as I struggle in my life. I then pose the question to myself.

Up until recently, I haven’t been able to answer it effectively. As I look at my wonderful and privileged life, I really have no reason to struggle, yet I do. Do you know what I mean? Since I published my first book and started this incredible journey back in 2004, I have been on a quest to find out why we struggle, and then, once enlightened, develop some strategies to help relieve my own struggles and those of others. A big task, I know it, but one I will be working on until the last breath has left my lungs.

The great news is that every day I live, I have more experiences, gain more insights, and find more answers. So, as I am writing this, I would like to offer one word that I believe will explain why we struggle, and how we can shift, in a heartbeat, from struggling to soaring in life. Are you ready?

That word is Focus.

It can’t be circumstances that determine outcomes in life. How can I say that when so many people are experiencing less than desirable circumstances? I can say it because there are people with exactly the same circumstances, responding in many different ways. Some see their circumstances as the worst thing possible and the reason for their misfortune in life. On the other hand, there are people in similar situations who believe those circumstances are a gift to help them become better and help others. So, what is the difference between these two groups of people? Focus!

What we focus on is what we get. If I focus on what I don’t want, don’t like, can’t do, wish I’d done, or don’t have, I will struggle. If I focus on what I do want, do like, can do, will do, and do have, I will soar. It is that simple. Focus is the cause of everything in our lives. It is this same thing that can help you fly to the heights in life as will cause you to spiral into its depths. The only difference is what you focus on. So then, if focus is the answer to what ails us, then the only medication we need to take, when we are struggling in life, is a healthy dose of re-focus.

As I walked into my church last Sunday, I was struggling. I had been asked by my Pastor to lead Holy Communion, and I didn’t want to do it. I felt like a fraud. I was focused on certain things in my life that were not as I would want them, as I compared myself to other people. Comparison is a bad idea, by the way. I didn’t know what to do, or how I would go delivering the Holy Communion message. My focus had taken me down into a struggling situation.

I walked into the church and headed straight for the toilet, for two reasons. Firstly, I needed to do what nature was calling me to do. Secondly, I didn’t feel ready to face anyone at that time. I was feeling flat. As I stood there, doing what I was there to do, I looked at the wall above the toilet, and my focus immediately shifted. There was a bible verse printed there that read:

But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

In an instant, my focus changed, and guess what else changed? You guessed it, my mood. All of a sudden, I realised I was not alone. In that moment, I felt stronger. In a heartbeat, I knew I had a positive message to share for the Holy Communion. I was ready to go and share God’s word of hope, love, forgiveness, and healing. I walked into the toilet one way and walked out a totally different way. The difference was focus.

My question to you is a simple, what are you focused on that is causing you to struggle, and how can you refocus to help you soar? Rather than focusing on what you can’t do because of your health, why not re-focus on what you can do to improve it. Rather than focusing on what you can’t do because of your financial situation, why not re-focus on what you can do to improve it. Rather than focusing on what is wrong in your relationship, why not re-focus on what you can do to improve it. When you do, you will feel and instantaneous shift in your mood, your actions and the results you will start to see in your life.

In my podcast this week called Free to be me, I speak with the fabulous Shaun Williams. At the age of 50, after 25 years of marriage, and four children, Shaun finally decided to come out and admit he had been gay his whole life. The second he re-focused on his authentic self, is the same moment his life changed forever. This is a powerful conversation I encourage you to listen to. Re-focus today and feel yourself move from struggling to soaring.

Cost Versus Value

by admin | 8 Nov, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset

We are living in trying times at the moment. The interest rates are rising, the cost of living is rising, and the amount of debt is rising, yet incredibly most people’s income is not. So, what do we do? For many people it is spending less, but in doing so, many people trap themselves in a cycle of survival, and never get to a thriving state. I am not just talking about money here. What if you truly understood the difference between cost and value? Would it make a difference?

I am suggesting it will help you to move beyond your circumstances to a state of thriving and abundance. I want to remind you of a very ethereal concept, and that is that every physical manifestation in your life is created from a thought, belief, or perspective you choose to focus on. In other words, the situations you are facing right now have far less to do with knowledge, ability, circumstances, luck, or other people, and far more to do with your thoughts, beliefs and perspectives. If you choose to believe me, and you understand that your outcomes in life are the result of your thoughts, beliefs, and perspectives, not any of the other things you may have been blaming, then you can create change in this instant.

Yes, this instant. How? Shift your thinking, and you immediately start yourself on a different path, to a very different outcome. I often talk about the time I was working seven days per week in two businesses and falling deeper into debt every day. I spiraled to $100,000 in debt. I think we can all agree that is an adverse situation. I was tempted to blame the economy, my lack of ability, the competition, and many other things that would shift the blame away from myself. Short term comfort maybe, but that mindset would have kept me stuck. So, rather than focusing on what I couldn’t do, didn’t have, and didn’t like, I refocused on how I wanted to live. That shift in focus sparked an idea and decision to write my first book. In that instant, my life changed. I immediately felt hope, I saw a path and I understood the difference between cost and value.

In basic terms, cost is what we pay for something (in time, money, attitude, or effort) and value is what it is worth. Far too many people, particularly in times of lack, look only at cost. They go for the cheapest, the thing that takes the least time or effort, and feel like they are making the wisest choice. What if, however, the thing that is the cheapest is the thing that will end up costing you much more down the track? For me, the decision to write a book was going to take time I didn’t really have. It would have made sense for me to just keep working hard on my personal training business. However, had I not invested valuable time in writing my first book, I would not be enjoying the freedom and joy I have today.

My health and wellbeing are important to me, and I hope for you also. Without it, I can’t do any of the things that are important to me to the level I desire. I eat well and have an extensive supplementation regime to ensure my body gets all the nutrients it needs for optimal wellbeing. I use a brand of vitamins and minerals that is at the higher end of the cost scale, but also at the top end of the value scale. They are organically grown, natural, and plant based, versus many products that are synthetically produced and much cheaper. This is an incredible example of cost versus value.

I know for a fact that the nutrients I take are far more readily absorbed into my body because they are in a natural state. In fact, 70-80% of the nutrients will be absorbed. In comparison, many products which are synthetically produced will have far less absorption because the body only allows natural foods into the blood stream. In most cases, only 10-20% of synthetic supplements will be absorbed, the rest will be eliminated and cause damage to the liver on the way out. If we were operating on a cost mindset, we might be tempted to buy the cheaper multi-vitamin from the discount chemist. Let’s say it cost $25 for the cheap and synthetic one, and $50 for the natural and organic one. You may think you are saving money buying the cheap one, right? But are you? What really is the cost of the cheaper product.

Firstly, $25 for 10-20% absorption versus $50 for 70-80% absorption. In other words, you will get 3 to 8 times more absorption by paying just twice as much for high quality and far greater value. Then, think of the cost on the body in removing the synthetic ingredients through the liver. What may be the cost of that, in terms of health recovery, down the track? I will leave that one for you to ponder. It is the same when we operate with a cost rather than value mindset to make decisions about clothes, mechanics, appliances, foods, education, personal development, where we invest our time, and many other things that you just can’t nickel and dime if you want to thrive and live an abundant life.

My podcast this week is called Just as you are with Louise Johnson. Louise is a burnout coach and suffered significant burnout in her job, which put her in hospital, by focusing on cost rather than value. It is a powerful conversation about the value we each have as individuals, irrespective of productivity. As you move forward from here and make decisions which will shape your life, please think carefully about what will help you live the life you desire and be very clear on how cost versus value will affect the life you ultimately experience.

Follow the signs

by admin | 1 Nov, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset

It really isn’t hard to find your way around these days. There are signs everywhere, and if you follow them, you will end up where you want to be. If you don’t, you will end up where you end up. So, let me suggest, if you want to save time, energy, and live your best life possible, follow the signs.

I am great at giving amazing advice, at times however, not so great at following it myself! I think we are all guilty of not seeing and following the signs at times in our life, even when the path laid out is so clear and simple, and, the destination so predictable.

I woke up last Sunday in Sydney and decided to go for a run. I was staying very close to the harbour bridge and so I decided to see if I could run across it. I thought to myself, there must be signs that will direct me as to where to go and how to get there. So, off I went, and, in fact, it was not too long before I came across a sign pointing in the direction I needed to go to get to the harbour bridge walking/running path. Incredibly, I didn’t follow the sign. I looked at where it was pointing, and then I looked at the bridge, and erroneously thought to myself, there must be an easier way. Have you ever said that to yourself about something? How did it turn out? Probably the same way it turned out for me.

I took off in my direction, and came upon one dead end after another, until 15-20 minutes later, I finally came to my senses. I went back to that first sign I found, followed it and, surprise surprise, it took me directly to the harbour bridge path. There are really no surprises about that one, are there? As I was running across the bridge marveling at the incredible structure, and looking out over the breathtaking views to the Opera House and beyond, I thought to myself, why didn’t I just follow the sign in the first place?

I can’t give you a sensible answer to that question, just as I can’t give you a sensible answer to the same question about many other signs in my life. Signs like a café falling deeper into debt every day, leading to it spiraling predictably into a $100,000 deficit. Signs like a relationship in conflict that inevitably led to more than one divorce. Signs that are there every single moment of every single day that we either choose to follow, or not. I am here to say in no uncertain terms, follow the signs or be prepared for the consequences.

The consequence of taking an additional 15-20 minutes to find the Sydney Harbour Bridge path, is far from devastating, but many other signs we ignore will be potentially more than devastating. Ignoring the signs to do something about your health could mean the end of your life. Disregarding the signs that your relationship is in trouble could mean the end of that relationship. Overlooking the signs that you need to change your spending habits could lead to crushing debt. Closing your eyes to the signs that stress is an issue in your life may lead to a life-altering addiction. The signs all point somewhere, pay attention, and follow the signs that will lead you to where you want to go, and, don’t question them the way I have in my life.

You know what I mean, don’t you? You are aware of the signs that are right in front of your face, aren’t you? What if you follow the signs that lead you to eating better, more exercise, investing time in building relationships, in prayer, in meditation, in saving and investing your money, and in building a strong self-worth? Life would start to change pretty significantly, don’t you think? The signs are there in front of your face. You just need to open your eyes to see them, and then – and I am talking to myself here – actually follow them.

In my podcast this week with Benjamin Smith called, Life through the nose, we talk about the obvious signs that can help lead to optimal wellbeing using his Ultimate Health Model. As you look up from this blog and reflect on yourself and your life, what sign is right in front of your face that you have been disregarding to this point? Can I make a suggestion? Pay attention to it, think about where you are heading by continually ignoring it, and if you want something better, then start following it. You can have, do, and be anything you want. All you need to do is follow the signs.

It’s not what you look at, it’s what you see

by admin | 24 Oct, 2024 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset

Have you ever noticed that when something happens that affects more than one person, there will often be many different responses to that event or situation? Why is that? If it is the same event that all the people are looking at, how can it elicit multiple responses? The answer is simple; it’s not what you look at that matters, it is what you see that makes the difference.

Okay, so what does that mean? Let’s use a very well-known and over-used situation; COVID. It was the same pandemic that people all around the world were dealing with, yet there were multiple responses. There was anger, frustration, transformation, connection, disconnection, anxiety, fear, gratitude, creativity, and many other reactions. How can one pandemic, the same pandemic, create so many outcomes? Because each and every person saw something different in the same thing we were all looking at. For me, I initially saw what I had lost and could no longer do, which resulted in fear and anxiety. Then, upon reflection, I saw something very different. I saw a chance to recalibrate and re-assess who I was and what I was doing. I saw an opportunity to learn and heal from many hurts. I saw a different way to do business that was much more effective and enjoyable. I saw more time to focus on me, my faith, and the things I was always ‘too busy’ for. I saw joy and I saw gratitude.

These days when I look at things I am very aware of and deliberate about what I see. When there was conflict, I used to see someone else at fault and why it wasn’t fair. Now I see my part in the conflict and how I could improve my approach moving forward. When I missed out on getting a speaking gig or new client, I used to see frustration and anger. Now, I see an opportunity to improve my approach and find a better option. When I used to receive a speeding fine, I would see red; anger with myself and the system. Now, I see gratitude that there is a system trying to reduce traffic accidents and that I can actually afford to pay the fine. When I am deliberate, I can always see something that will enhance my life. So, by the way, can you.

It is fair to say we, as humans, have a tendency to spiral into victim and blame mode far too quickly. Whilst it may give some short-term comfort, it will never help us move forward in life. Victim and blame lead us to… STUCK! I know no-one wants to be stuck, so the only way we can keep moving is to change the way we look at things so we see what will lift and empower us in life. After I read in the newspaper, many years ago, that I was sacked from the St Kilda Football Club, I reacted with anger, blame, and a serious case of victim-thinking. I went and said some things I regret to this day and destroyed any chance of a future professional career with the club. STUCK! After some time and reflection, I looked again and saw freedom from a very stressful environment. I saw the chance to reconnect with the game I used to love. I saw an opportunity to join with an amateur club and a group of amazing men I played with for the next 12 years. I will be grateful for that time in my life for as long as I live.

So, my question to you is what are you looking at now, and most importantly, what do you see? If what you see is causing any angst in your life, I want to encourage you to try to see something different. In your relationship, could you see how you can make it better? With your health, can you see what you can do to get back to optimal wellbeing? Financially, could you see what options there are to gain strength in that area? In your career, can you see what would be required to take it to the next level. You can see all of these things if you open your eyes to really see what is possible.

In my podcast this week with world champion triathlete Jo King, called Baby steps, we discuss how something which looks overwhelming, can be seen as very achievable when we take baby steps each and every day. My greatest encouragement for you is to change the lens by which you are looking at things in your life. When you look at something that seems undesirable, unwanted, and adverse, change the filter. Trust me when I say, you will always find a lesson, a blessing, or an opportunity, if you are very deliberate. The reason is simple, it’s not what you look at, it’s what you see.