What stops most people from really exploring their potential, pursuing possibility, and fulfilling their destiny? It is not what most think it is. It is not lack of talent, ability, or intellect. It is not challenging circumstances or adverse situations. It is not other people’s opinions. It is not bad luck or poor timing. It is not the weather or any other external influence. It is 100% our thinking. Yes, I hate that also as it makes me 100% responsible. The biggest excuse we have allowed ourselves to start using these days, to effectively stop us in our tracks, is the catchy, but totally irrelevant and inaccurate ‘Imposter Syndrome’. So, let’s examine it, shall we?
I have used the term ‘Imposter Syndrome’ about myself, without really understanding what it means. As you know – or will know in about 3 seconds – our language and self-talk, and the words we use will shape and determine the life we live. The late great Skip Ross calls it the principle of command and states, everything you speak out of your mouth will happen, so be careful what you say. Gilbert Enoka, mental skills coach for the All-Blacks, says, you will never rise above the opinion you have of yourself. These are two men with incredible success, track record, and wisdom. I believe them. That being the case, we need to be very careful what words we choose.
If we look at a definition of ‘Imposter syndrome’, it is a feeling of inadequacy and self-doubt despite one’s achievements and success. However, when we look at the definition of the word ‘imposter’ we get; a person who pretends to be someone else in order to deceive others. I think we can all agree there is a large discrepancy between these two definitions which contain the same word.
I know of many times in my life where I would have described myself as having imposter syndrome. Starting out as a professional footballer, and many times through that seven-year journey, being a business owner, becoming an author, and many other times in my life. However, looking at the definition of imposter, I never deliberately pretended to be someone else to deceive others. I did feel inadequate, and I did doubt myself and my abilities because I had another type of syndrome. It’s called ‘Human Being Syndrome’.
Guess who else has ‘Human Being Syndrome’? Every single human being that is upright and looking down at the grass. If you doubt yourself, you are not an imposter, you are a human, so celebrate. If you feel inadequate at times, you are not deceitful, you are a human being, so rejoice. If you have negative self-talk at times, you are not broken, you are a human being, so jump for joy. Isn’t that great news? Every human being’s adventure is simply to validate and navigate these feelings and find ways to push past them anyway.
So, the first step on this journey is to stop referring to what you have as ‘imposter syndrome’, because in most cases you are not pretending, and you are not deceiving. Then replace it with the more accurate, and compassionate, ‘human being syndrome’. The second step is to get excited when you feel ‘human being syndrome’ starts to take effect. That means you may start to feel anxiety, fear, doubt, or inadequacy. Yes, I did say get excited. Why? Because it means you are on the verge of a breakthrough, if you simply have the courage to take the next step with faith.
These feelings indicate you are at the edge of your comfort zone, otherwise there would be no doubt or fear. So, my friend, take the step outside of your comfort zone, and you will see it is not so scary. At the same time, you will be expanding your comfort zone to include in it more amazing things for yourself and your life. In my podcast this week called Chocolate bar life, I speak with the fabulous Danielle Colley. We discuss many things, but one key point is about embracing who you are and taking simple steps every day to enhance your human experience.
I am in the process of writing a book called The Redefinition Effect, and I feel like ‘Imposter Syndrome’ is a term that definitely needs re-definition and re-interpretation. As we examine the term, it is actually a very damaging one as it suggests that if we feel doubt, fear, anxiety, and inadequacy, we are pretending and deceiving. We have determined that, in fact, it means we are human. So, enjoy your life, embrace the ‘human being syndrome’ and take the step boldly across your comfort zone and into your fabulous zone.