by admin | 26 Mar, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
I love gifts, don’t you? When you get handed a parcel, the first thing that happens is your imagination goes wild as you start to envisage what wonderful delights will be unveiled as you unwrap it. There are times, however, when the actual gift and the expectation of the unveiling are worlds apart. The gift looked so good, until you unwrapped it, that is! Have you experienced that? Well, how would you like to get an incredible life-changing gift with every single unwrapping?
I guarantee that you will be handed a gift today. It may not look like a gift, feel like a gift or smell like a gift, but trust me, it is a brilliant gift. I heard it described this way; Every problem or challenge is a gift. The bigger the issue, the more layers of wrapping you will need to take off, but the more precious the gift inside will be. That is powerful, and it is incredibly true. I have found this to be the case in my life, over and over again.
I love to travel. I love to travel even more when someone else is paying for it. I had a paid speaking event in sunny Queensland, and I was excited that my flight would be paid for, my accommodation would be paid for, and a large amount of money would be deposited into my bank account. Does it get any better than that? Soon before I was about to leave on this exciting adventure, the phone call came. ‘Andrew, I’m sorry to tell you that the event has been cancelled. The world is going crazy, and this coronavirus seems to be raging out-of-control. I hope we might be able to rebook it, but at this stage there are no guarantees.’
Soon after that phone call, in March 2020, there were more calls, more messages, and more emails. One by one each paid speaking gig evaporated in front of my very eyes, and with it, tens of thousands of dollars of income. I felt a numb feeling engulf my body as I slid down the wall and dissolved into an almighty tantrum. After about 10 to 15 minutes of self-absorbed victim-thinking dummy-spitting I decided, due to the perspective I had learned in my life, this was not a problem, instead a very precious gift that needed to be unwrapped.
The first layer of the wrapping revealed to me what was in my control. The second layer started to unlock some answers as I asked myself the question, what do I do now? As I took off that final layer of wrapping, I saw opportunities, greater than I’ve seen for many years in my life. Opportunities to speak on a global stage, opportunities to impact more lives, opportunities to make a difference during this trying time in history, and opportunities to do things I never thought I could do.
I have said it before, and I will say it again, COVID-19 was an incredibly transformational time in my life, as it revealed to me opportunities to gain more clarity about what I want and in the purpose of my life to do more of what I’m on this planet to do. Initially, it seemed like an incredible problem, but on reflection and with a positive focus, proper perspective, and spontaneous action it was an incredibly precious gift that has blessed my life and many other lives.
As I look back at all the challenges and adversity in my life, all I see are precious gifts. Being sacked from my professional football club, was a wonderful gift that put me on a path in the health and wellbeing industry. Losing hundreds of thousands of dollars in business and investments, turned out to be an invaluable gift that led me to make an illogical yet necessary course correction in my life. Three divorces gave me the gift of awareness, forgiveness, and self-acceptance. Losing my mother to cancer, allowed me the gift and opportunity of sharing her inspiration and legacy. Each one of these parcels needed much unwrapping, but, sure enough, there was a precious gift inside each one.
As I listened to Charlene Madden tell her story on this week’s podcast called, Choose life, I heard the same message. A lady whose life was littered with abuse, addiction, abandonment, and depression was finally able to unwrap the many layers of the trauma she had experienced to enjoy the incredible gift that comes with helping others. This is a podcast I urge you to listen to.
From this day on, enjoy the gifts that come your way. When your initial reaction to a problem, challenge or adversity is to complain, blame or criticism, stop and ask yourself this question: if I take the time to reflect and unwrap this parcel, what precious gift will I find inside? If you expect to find that precious gift, you will find it every time. Enjoy unwrapping your gifts today.
by admin | 19 Mar, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
The most devastating affliction I am fighting against every day at the moment is not COVID or any other physical ailment. I am currently at war against the dreaded perfectionism disease. I am trying to heal and reform the people who say things like, I didn’t do anything because I was scared it wouldn’t be any good, if I am not good at it, I won’t do it, if it’s not perfect then I am not good enough, and I have to get it right first time. This is going to sound weird, funny, or even counter-intuitive, but I want to encourage you to aim to get it wrong the first time!
Get what wrong? Not everything, that’s for sure. If you are about to jump out of a plane for the first time, make sure you have done everything you need to do to get it right, the first time. However, even when jumping out of a plane, if you have ever done it, how many safe jumps did you make and how much did you practice before you went up in the plane? I am sure your first jump was terrible, right? How was your first attempt at walking? Perfect the first time, or a spectacular flop? How about your first attempt to ride a bike, kick a football, play an instrument, or make a sales call? Perfect? Or breathtakingly off the mark?
We know this logically, don’t we? The truth is, it is impossible to perfect anything on the first attempt, so why do we beat ourselves up mercilessly, judge ourselves critically and then make crazy decisions to give up on important things because we couldn’t get it right the first time? I am glad I do not have this character trait. I am proud of my averageness and imperfection, and I am excited about getting things wrong the first time. And the second, and the third and the fourth. I also know that my level of ‘wrong’ reduces with each attempt I make and eventually know I will get it right. How many attempts and how long does it take? As many attempts as required and as long as I need. I don’t care. I have one goal and one goal only, and that is to get the job done. To get something right, you have to be excited about getting it wrong the first time.
I am currently working with many aspiring authors, and I would have to say, tragically, the ones who have given up on the journey are the ones who resolutely hung on to the belief that if they couldn’t get it right the first time, they never would. No matter what I would say to them, no matter what evidence I would give them and no matter what made logical sense, they would give up on something that could have been one of the greatest joys and opportunities in their lives. If you are squirming as you are reading this, then this blog is for you. If you are tempted to stop reading, then hold on until the end with everything you have. If you fit into the perfectionist, I must get it right the first-time category, then this is possibly the most important message you can ever read, if you want to love your life, that is.
Go and talk to anyone who is doing what you would like to do, has achieved what you would like to achieve or has what you would like to have and ask them if they got it right the first time. If you find anyone who says yes, please let me know because I want to talk to them! We look at people who do things so seemingly effortlessly and incorrectly assume they were perfect, right from the beginning. Ha! They were just as clueless and incompetent as you believe you are. They just aimed to get it wrong the first time, knowing that with each imperfect attempt, and with resolute persistence, they would finally get the result they wanted.
This is my story to a tee; with everything I have achieved. I don’t know anyone more average, incompetent, or clueless than me when I started out in pursuit of the things I am grateful to have achieved. Getting it wrong never bothered me, however, not giving it a go always did. I now celebrate getting things wrong because it means I am moving, learning, evolving, and succeeding. In my podcast this week, called Actually living the dream I speak with Kara Bitar. She got it wrong for many years, as a lawyer, before she got it very right in terms of finding her passion and purpose in life. Now she is actually living her dream.
As always, today is a new day. You get to start afresh and change your attitude about what success and happiness represents for you. In my life, I now know that getting it right first time is neither success nor real. So, that being the case, I hope you will go forth with the attitude that getting it wrong the first time is the outcome you want. Embrace it, learn from it, and try again. Watch what happens in your life.
by admin | 12 Mar, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Have you ever told yourself that there are some things you just can’t do? I am pretty sure we have all done that. My question is, if you haven’t tried before, how do you know? We often put a lid on our potential and we limit our capacity by limiting beliefs that have no basis in what is actually true for us. You can spend as much time in your mind as you like hypothesising why you can’t do something, or you can just give it a go. Capacity is not a physical thing, or a willpower thing, it is a state of mind thing.
I have recently been challenged in my own thinking about capacity and inspired by a young man who has effectively taken away all my excuses for not believing in my potential. In my podcast this week called Run for wishes, with Sean Bell, my thinking was radically expanded, and I hope this message does the same for you. I won’t go into the whole story, you can listen to that, however, what I do want to tell you is that you can do far more than you are doing, and possibly think you can. Me too!
Sean, after losing a close friend at the age of 18, decided to honour his friend and raise awareness and money for charity and made the decision that he would run 50 marathons in 50 days. Yes, you read that correctly, and I also wrote that correctly… 50 marathons in 50 days! That is one marathon every day for 50 days! There would be many people, possibly even me if I am being honest, who would say that running 50 marathons in 50 days is not physically possible. There would be many educated people who could go to lengths to prove that the body is not capable of withstanding that volume of effort for such an intense period. The muscular capacity, the ability to recover, the body’s energy systems and the human capacity would all be stretched, pushed, and punished to the max. So, even with the science, and even with the opinions of many people, how did Sean do it? In fact, as you hear him talk about it, you may also ask, how did it do it so seemingly easily? The answer, capacity is a mindset!
The body will go where the mind believes it can go. Now, don’t get me wrong, there was comprehensive preparation involved, both mentally, physically, and nutritionally to be able to do it. The bottom line, however, was that Sean believed he could and then decided he would. As we were talking about how he was able to do it, he said the most important thing he required was an impenetrable ‘why?’ He asked himself the following question: What are ten reasons why I will achieve this audacious goal? He made a list of ten powerful reasons, and each day he got up to prepare for his next marathon, often feeling like going back to bed, he read this list, and knew why he would successfully do it again on that day.
I resonated so much with what Sean was saying, as I reflected to the moment, whilst working seven days per week in two businesses, when I decided to write my first book with no time, no skills, no experience, and no qualifications. If it wasn’t for a clear vision and many compelling reasons I would not be where I am today, living the amazing life I live. Capacity is a mindset, and your potential is unlimited, so I hope after reading this blog, and listening to the podcast with Sean, you will set your sights on something that scares you.
You see, the achievement of an audacious goal, or seemingly impossible aspiration is not in reaching the finish line. It lies in the simple steps you take every day. Sean just focused on the next lamppost, not running across the finish line of his 50th marathon. I just focused on the few words I would write every day, not a 50,000-word manuscript that was required. When you focus on the weight you want to lose, the money you want in savings, the book you want to write, the marathon you want to finish, it can be so easy to come to the erroneous conclusion that you can’t do it. When you focus on the daily steps required, and commit to keep going, you will soon know, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that you can do it. Whatever it may be.
Sean Bell is now on the verge of running from Cairns to Melbourne, a distance of 3700 km. He calls it Run for Wishes and is raising money for the Make a Wish Foundation. He will be running on average 60km for 60 days to raise $60k! How can he do it? Simple, he has a strong reason, he will be ultra-prepared, he will just focus on one step and one day at a time, and because he knows that capacity is a state of mind.
by admin | 5 Mar, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
Freedom is a powerful word, isn’t it? Like many words, it means different things to different people. As I searched for a definition of freedom, I found: The condition of being free of restraints, especially the ability to act without control or interference by another or by circumstance. When we think about the common uses of the word freedom, we think of freedom from oppression, freedom from tyranny, freedom from prison, freedom from war, financial freedom, freedom from sickness and the freedom to choose. However, I think one freedom trumps all of these, and is not reliant on any of them. That freedom lies underneath the mask you and I are wearing.
I was inspired beyond belief by a client and friend of mine, Rosina, who had the courage to join Shaun Hart and I on this week’s podcast called, Living in the third dimension. Trust me, this is a podcast worth listening to, and not because of me. I watched Rosina transform before my very eyes as she openly talked about her fears, doubts, and lack of self-worth. Shaun helped her realise that it was this vulnerability and humility that was her strength and her purpose, not the pretence or persona she was putting on to seem okay to people around her.
In fact, Shaun said that true freedom is only available in the third dimension, and that is emotional and spiritual freedom, and has nothing to do with where you live, the political situation in your country, whether you are being held captive or your financial position. True freedom comes from being authentically and unapologetically you. It comes when you finally decide that you are enough just as you are, and you can drop the mask you are wearing that is portraying you to be someone you are not.
I can tell you, from personal experience, wearing a mask is exhausting and stressful. Being unapologetically who you are is the most freeing thing you can do. I have spoken ad-nauseum about my insecurities and my desire to be seen as anyone except who I was. I was a scared for people to know the real me because I didn’t feel I stacked up and was sure I would not be loved if people knew the truth. Well, what I believed was the truth anyway. I believed the truth was that I was not good enough to be loved, accepted, or admired as I was. It was a lie I was telling myself, and so I kept the mask on until I realised, I was being held captive by my own wrong thinking.
I was reading a book, which I think I have spoken about before, which proclaimed in big, bold words that when I wear a mask, it is the mask that gets loved, not me. No wonder, whilst wearing the mask, I never felt any better about myself. No wonder I was always stressed that people would discover the truth. No wonder I was so exhausted. I decided at that moment to drop the mask and reveal myself, warts, and all. The first person I needed to reveal myself to was me. I needed to learn to understand, accept, forgive, and love myself. I realised that I was okay, and maybe, just maybe I was good enough just who I was. I immediately felt lighter.
Then I needed to reveal myself to the people who I was so scared would reject me if they knew my warts, vulnerabilities, and insecurities. Guess what? I started building stronger and deeper relationships. I started inspiring and empowering people. Most importantly, I started feeling a freedom that had eluded me my entire life up until that point. I now know beyond any shadow of a doubt that God loves me, I love me and the people who care the most love me. I now know beyond any shadow of a doubt that it is this vulnerability, and my desire to help others become free from their self-imposed prison which is my purpose and mission on this planet. I am free, because I dropped the mask to show myself, as gloriously flawed and imperfect as I am.
I hope this blog has moved you in a direction that will also inspire you to drop your mask and reveal your beauty to the world. You are beautiful and your real rawness is exactly what the world needs. Please don’t waste any more of your life hiding or feeling that you are not good enough just as you are. You are a child of God, and therefore are already amazing. Freedom is waiting for you and will be yours the moment you remove the mask to reveal your wonderful self to the world.
by admin | 25 Feb, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
Are you ready to celebrate? Celebrate what? You may be asking. Do you really need an occasion, an achievement, or an event before you can celebrate? I think not. As I searched the definition of celebrate on my search engine, it came up with to observe with ceremonies of respect, festivities or rejoicing. In my mind, that doesn’t require a specific goal accomplishment or infrequent milestone occasion, it just requires you. Yes, you. I want to encourage you to celebrate you, today and every day moving forward.
You may be saying, there is nothing about me to celebrate. Without even necessarily knowing you,I would have to strongly disagree with that statement. I know there are things to celebrate about yourself right now. How do I know? Because you, like me, are a gloriously imperfect human, and I have already had multiple celebrations today, and it is not even 10am as I write this. I will talk about the cause for my celebrations shortly, but first I want to try and give you a new perspective on reasons to celebrate.
Why is it we are so conditioned to not be happy, proud or feel good about ourselves until we get to a point in time when society declares we may now celebrate? That is rubbish! I mean, have you ever had a wedding? Were you stressed, anxious and overwhelmed in the lead up, not allowing yourself to really feel the joy of the occasion until the wedding actually happens? If not, have you ever known anyone who has? Why is that? Why not celebrate yourself for finding love? Why not celebrate the wonderful person you are to be loved? Why not celebrate each action, in each day that leads to the moment you are standing at the alter?
Why do I have to hold off my celebration, joy, and self-love until I have published my next book? Wow, let me tell you, there would not be a lot of celebration in my life if I did. And it would be a false celebration anyway because holding the book is not the achievement. The achievement is having the idea. The achievement is getting started. The achievement is each word that I write. The achievement is writing badly on the days when I don’t feel like it. The achievement is me! What happens if we hold off our celebration until we make the team, get the grade, earn the income, lose the weight, or reach the goal, and we don’t achieve it? Are we a failure? Are we worthless? Are we useless? Are we incapable? Are we unlovable? The tragedy is, that is how many people feel. The reality is that these people are focusing on the wrong source and reasons to celebrate.
As I write this, it is Saturday morning. I woke up this morning at about 6:15am, and as I threw back the covers and put my feet on the floor, I celebrated. I celebrated my getting up to enjoy and new and wonderful day. I rode my bike to the local park where I do my workout, and all the way there I was celebrating. I then did my workout, which consisted of 240 muscle ups. Do you think I waited till number 240 to celebrate? No, I celebrated every single one, because if I didn’t, I never would have made it to 240. I celebrated my ride home, I celebrated taking my dog for a walk, I am now celebrating each word of this blog I am writing because I know it will impact lives.
Every day, I celebrate me in many ways. I celebrate me for the things I do to be the best I can be. I celebrate me for the things I do that positively impact others. I celebrate me for my heart. I celebrate me for my grit, determination, and resilience. I even celebrate me for my insecurities, poor choices, and vulnerabilities. Why? Because that is what makes me who I am and that is what helps me learn and become a better man each and every day. I celebrate me, because I am worthy of celebration. So are you!
This blog is to help you realise that your worth is NOT based on your achievements, your education, the money you have in the bank, how fast you can run 10km, how much weight you can lift, how you look or any of the other things we have been manipulated to believe really matters. Your worth is you. The character traits you have, the heart you have, the influence you have on others, your smile that lights up the room, the things that bring you joy and the fact that you are alive. You see, God made no junk. God breathed life into you, knowing that you are amazing and that you are here to leave your mark on earth. Every day you live, everything you do and every person you interact with is creating that powerful legacy. Wow, if that isn’t something to celebrate, I don’t know what is.
I was excited to publish episode number 100 of The Wellness Puzzle Podcast this week, called Time to reflect. As I was reflecting, I recognised that there were so many moments of joy and celebration in the journey to create, launch and continue to put my podcast out to the world. I am proud of myself. You should be proud of you. My challenge to you today is to see how many ways you can find to celebrate you. The more you do, the better you will feel, the more you will do and better the results will come flooding into your life. Trust me on this, and… celebrate you!
by admin | 18 Feb, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
From a physiological standpoint, shedding a tear is a very significant bodily function, with a very important role. A tear contains vital nutrients, including water, electrolytes, proteins, lipids, and mucins. All of these ingredients help tears perform many vital roles for eye health such as: lubrication, cleansing, protection, nutrition and enhancing cell function, just to name a few. But do you know what? As impressive as this is and as important as these nutrients and their benefits are, they are not what I believe makes a tear so powerful. So, what does?
I have said it before and I will say it again, I am a crier. Over many years, I have had a plethora of tears leak, fall, stream, and cascade from my eyes. Tears of incredible joy, tears of devastating heartbreak, tears of proud moments and tears of painful regret. Let me tell you, in all of these tearful moments, I have never once stopped to think about the nutrient content of each tear, nor the role the tear plays in my eye health. Have you? To me, the power that resides in the tear is the emotion that it carries, and the potential of that emotion to change lives.
The word emotion is derived from the Latin word emovre, which translated means excite or agitate into motion. It is rare tears flow for reasons that are not emotion based, which means there is incredible potential for ongoing positive change in your life, if that’s what you want. I know it’s what I want, and now that I understand this power, I look forward to these tears, because I know, when they happen, I am ready to make great things happen in my life.
For much of my life I have been embarrassed by my tears. I thought they meant I was weak or too sensitive and that it was a bad thing. Well, let me tell you my friend, tears are not a sign of weakness, they are a sign of readiness. The key is to understand this and be prepared to take positive action when they appear, because in that tear resides a potential force more powerful that anything you can think of. I remember, when I was 16 years old, after years focus and determination, I received a letter from the St Kilda Football Club inviting me to come and participate in their pre-season training. I sobbed like a baby! Those tears represented the work I had put in to realise a dream, and the desire I had to make it as a professional footballer. With the strong emotions that were contained inside those tears, I got to work even harder to make that vision a reality in my life.
I remember a very dark day in my life, when I was in huge debt, had no time, a failing business and I was helpless, hopeless, discouraged and broken. I sat there with tears flooding out of my eyes, thinking about where I was in my life, and visualising the life I wanted. With the emotion that was so built up in those tears to change my situation, I had the illogical idea to write my first book. Those tears and powerful emotions were almost 20 years ago, and the result was that my life changed forever in that moment on that day back in 2002.
My final story of tears is quite a recent one. After my third marriage ended in the second half of 2019, I was left feeling inadequate, flawed, regretful, confused, and shameful. Oh, I cried many tears, for many hours over many days, weeks, and months. I must admit that my initial desire was to run away and hide from the broken man who was looking back at me in the mirror. But I realised those tears represented things about myself and my life I wanted to and needed to change. They were the catalyst of a transformation that I don’t have time to unpack in this blog, but one that helped me understand, accept, forgive, heal, and learn to love myself. It was all in the powerful emotions that were living in those tears.
We are all human, which means we are fabulously flawed, and amazingly emotional. This is to be celebrated, not hidden or ashamed of. Please take the time to listen to my podcast this week with Jacqueline Shaulis, called Embrace your awesome. You are incredible just as you are, and when the situations in your life bring you to tears, rejoice! Those tears hold within them emotion so powerful that it can move you into action to change your own world, and the lives of others. Embrace every tear, love every tear, and use every tear to help you move on and live the incredible life you are destined to live.
