by admin | 7 Nov, 2020 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Emotions, hey? They can either work for you in an incredibly positively powerful way, or they can take you down and out and turn potential into pulp. Have you noticed how, when you feel strong emotions of empowerment, excitement and determination you go forth and create wonderful change in your life? Have you also noticed how anger, anxiety, bitterness, fear and resentment can immediately lead to action, or inaction as the case may be, which defeats, discourages and destroys? What if I told you, that you were in control of the direction of your emotions and the path your life takes?
Have you ever worn a pair of sunglasses? When you put them on, what happens to the colour of the world you see? It changes, right? What colour does it change to? Whatever the colour of the lens, right? If the lens is green, the world is green. If the lens is brown, the world brown. If you put on glasses with blue lenses, you don’t see red, right? If you go inside a dark room with the sunglasses on, what do you normally do? You probably take them off I imagine. Then what about when you go back outside on a bright and sunny day? Put them back on? I’m sure you do. So, the concept of sunglasses is a pretty simple one to understand, right?
The point I want to make with this seemingly obvious and inane dialogue around sunglasses is that you get to choose the colour of the lens you look through and you also get to change the lens if you want a different colour, or more or less bright. In the same way, your emotional state is light or dark based on the lens you are looking at a certain situation through, and, you also get to change that lens, if you choose to. Isn’t that amazing news? Well, it’s actually great and tragic news. It’s great because, you get to change the lens, change your emotional state and positively change the outcomes in your life. It’s tragic because, if you buy what I am saying, there’s now no one else to blame for the way you feel or the actions you take as a result. D’oh!
The most powerful example I can think of about the impact of the lens, is when I destroyed my professional football career many years ago. Yes, you read that correctly. I destroyed my professional football career, because of the lens I chose to look through. I won’t go into the whole sad story, but I will say the trigger was when I woke up on a Saturday morning two weeks after the end of the season in 1987 and I read in the newspaper that I have been de-listed from the club. I was the wearing the, it’s-not-fair, victim-minded and it’s-your-fault lens. Through that lens, I saw red and became angry, bitter and resentful. As a result, I proceeded to do and say things that destroyed any future potential as a professional athlete.
Now, had I chosen to wear the, self-responsibility, desire-to-improve and gain-constructive feedback lens, I would have felt very differently and taken some very different actions in response to that event. Had I done that, who knows what may have been the long-term result? So, I want to encourage you, this week, to adjust the lens you are looking through if it’s leading to an emotional state that will lead to a choice that you will later regret. Please don’t ever live with regret, it’s no fun and so easily avoided!
When you don’t get the result you want, put on the I’m-good-enough and I’ll-try-again lens. When someone says or does something that is not nice or fair, put on the I-forgive-you and I-hope-you’re-okay lens. When you make a mistake or a poor choice, put on the I-forgive-me and learn-the-lesson lens. I promise, when you choose the right lens, no matter the situation or circumstance, you will create emotions that will strengthen your physical wellbeing and move you into positive and life enhancing action.
It is our emotional state that has the largest impact on the life we live, so a feeling of emotional intelligence and freedom is one we need to cultivate. This week’s podcast, called ‘Finding emotional freedom’ with Mandi Freger, will help if you are struggling with anxiety, stress or other potentially destructive emotions. My friend, the best thing you can do, when confronted with a challenging situation or circumstance – to insure that you respond, don’t react and build, don’t destroy – is to make sure you choose the right lens to look at it through.
by admin | 31 Oct, 2020 | Andrew's Blog, Inspiration
I think, to some extent, everyone’s confidence has taken a little bit of a hit over the course of 2020. There’s a little more fear, uncertainty and conservative behaviour creeping into to everyone’s lives at some level, and even though I talk a good game, that counts for me also. Whilst a little nervous, I had my first real adventure this week since COVID has kicked in, and it was such an awesome experience that I want to encourage you to embrace any and all opportunities for adventure.
I had a school session booked in for last Friday. It had been booked in for several months, and because of current circumstances, I had assumed it would be an online session for this group of year 9 students. Well, about a week before the session, I got an email from the guy who was co-ordinating the session to say they had justified my visit as ‘being essential,’ and so I would be going to the school. Interestingly, my first reaction to that was not excitement that I would be getting out to go to a school, it was actually a little anxiety.
I was anxious for several reasons. The first being that the school is in Geelong, a rural town about 90 mins to two hours from where I live, and I don’t have a driver’s license, so I didn’t know how I would get there. The second reason was one I had fought hard for 8 months and was fear about getting out in public again, even though I knew there was nothing to worry about, the bad news and fear that had gripped the world had infiltrated my defenses. Finally, because I had been at home delivering online sessions for so long, and it had really become my new normal, I was concerned I would not click back into the face to face session as easily.
However, despite my concerns, I decided to embrace this adventure, get out there and make it an amazing experience. The main challenge was getting there, so I decided to catch a train into the city and another out to Geelong. Then I had a friend who wanted to observe the session, who would pick me up from the station, we would go to the school together, afterwards go out for lunch and then she would drop me back off at the station. Sounded like a great plan until the school came back and said that they could not approve her visit, as it was against the ‘COVID’ rules. So, I had to get myself to the school, and then she would pick me up afterwards.
At this point, however, I was committed to and actually getting excited about this adventure. My amazing father, always concerned about me, actually offered to pay for an Uber from my place to the school 90-minutes away, a $150 fare! As much as I appreciated the offer, and told him so, I explained how I was committed to and excited about the adventure of finding my own way there. I think he thought I was a little looney, even though he has got used to that over the years. So, Friday came along and off I went. I caught and Uber to the station, a train into the city, a train to Geelong, got a taxi to the school, but because of roadworks and lots of confusion, I ended up walking about 1km on a dirt road, jumped a locked gate and finally got to the school. Quite an adventure already!
I then delivered this session and, oh my gosh, it was so amazing to be back in a room with real people. I could see their faces, feel their energy, respond to their questions, interact with them and I really feel like I made a difference in their lives. It reinforced to me my mission and purpose in life and it excited me even more to get out, travel, have more adventures and impact more lives, all around the world. I left feeling so incredibly inspired and energised.
My friend picked me up from the school, after her own challenges finding it, and we went off to have lunch at the café she had booked. The adventure continued as, after we were asked for ID at the café, they told me that I could not eat there because I was from Melbourne, the naughty corner of Australia and the world! I wasn’t allowed to eat in any café or restaurant because of the COVID restrictions place on all Melburnian residents! So, we went and bought some take away and sat on the grass overlooking the beach and had a very enjoyable lunch and conversation. Not what we had planned, but an exciting adventure, nevertheless! My friend dropped me back at the station and I got home without any further detours and, as I thought about and reflected on the day and adventure I had just had, I smiled!
I am so glad I did it. I was a little hesitant at first, but so grateful that I chose to take it on. I know life is still a little uncertain at the moment, but don’t let COVID or fear dampen your adventurous spirit. There is an amazing world of opportunity, joy, achievement, significance and purpose just waiting for you. In my podcast with Kim Vandenberg, called, ‘Stay in your own lane,’ she talks about her wonderful adventure of getting to the 2008 Beijing Olympics as a swimmer. She totally embraced adventure in her life, and it has led to some incredible outcomes and opportunities. So, why not you? Get out, while you can, and make the most of every second of the wondrous possibilities and excitement that life offers each and every one of us if we are willing to embrace adventure.
by admin | 24 Oct, 2020 | Andrew's Blog, Inspiration
I am taking no credit for this week’s blog, and I am giving it all to the amazing Stacey Copas. This lady has totally inspired me on my podcast this week called ‘Gratitude is a choice.’ She is the one who coined the phrase, if nothing is certain, then anything is possible, and I loved it so much I decided to write about it in this week’s blog.
I really want to encourage you to listen to this week’s podcast, and hear Stacey for yourself, if you haven’t already. Oh my gosh! She will change your life, if you listen and apply what she says. From the age of 12, and after an accident, diving into a shallow pool, Stacey has been a quadriplegic living in a wheelchair. Now some 30 years later, she has found incredible joy and significance in her life. So, when she dropped the phrase, if nothing is certain, then anything is possible, I asked her, ‘what do you mean?’
Now, as I try to explain it, and I won’t do as good a job as Stacey, I want you to think about the immediate impact this statement will have on your life, if you get it, and act on it. She said that it had come up in her life over the last couple of years, but was really reinforced to her this year, 2020. I think we would all agree that in these ‘unprecedented’ times (together, we actually banned the word!), there has been a lot of uncertainty. She went on to say, that whilst ‘uncertainty’ is seen as a negative thing, upon reflection, it meant to her that if nothing is certain, then essentially, we have a blank canvas. If we have a blank canvas, then anything is possible. I don’t know about you, but I love it!
If your job situation is uncertain, then you can go and create any career you like. If your relationship status is uncertain, then you can decide to make it the best it can be, or a find a new one and make it amazing. If your health position is uncertain, then you have the choice to start the journey of creating optimal wellbeing. If you are uncertain about how long COVID will last, then you can use the time to write a book, learn an instrument, start a podcast, start a ‘side-hustle’ business. By the way, ‘side-hustle’ is getting close to be another term that will be banned, as is the word ‘pivot’ LOL!
As I look back at my 2020, I am going to say something that may be controversial to some, and I certainly don’t mean it disrespectfully to anyone who has experienced any suffering or loss in this time. I am very empathetic to those people. I have to say that the best thing that has happened in my life, for a long time, is COVID! Yes, I told you that sounds weird and a little controversial, but let me explain. In many ways; I am a better person, I am able to make more of a difference, I have found a global audience, I have connected with some incredible people, and, most importantly, I have re-built the most important relationship I have, the one with myself.
The uncertainty of my future speaking and mentoring, has opened the possibility of the other ways to help and communicate, and so I have actually moved from a local market to a global one. I am a much bigger thinker and have met and am now collaborating with winners all around the world. It wouldn’t have happened without the uncertainty of this time. I have finally started my podcast, which I am loving and I know it’s making a difference. I doubt whether it would have happened without lockdown and the uncertainty that came with it. I have found more people to help; write their books, improve their wellbeing and enhance their financial position. Without the uncertainty of this time, I don’t think these opportunities would have been a possibility. Most importantly, the uncertainty of lockdown isolation has created the most amazing possibility, the possibility to take the time to get know, like and even love myself. What an absolute gift.
As you move forward in your life and deal with the uncertainty that still lies ahead of all of us, and will continue to do so, try to see the wonderous opportunities that are out there in what seems to be a void. As Stacey Copas so profoundly said, that uncertainty is actually a blank canvas. It is up to you what you paint on that canvas. Right now, as you deal with uncertainty, get excited and be grateful knowing that, as a result, anything is possible.
by admin | 16 Oct, 2020 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
As I write this week’s blog it is Saturday morning. Let me tell you, I am scrambling. Why? Because there is an incredible live-streamed event happening today between 12 noon and 4pm that I know will absolutely bless some people, and I am working to the very last minute to see who I can encourage to join it. I have no idea who may attend in a spur-of-the-moment decision and take the information they receive, apply it and then take action that changes their life. If that happens, I know they, and I, will be singing!
This is going to sound harsh, but we live in a society of quitters. In fact, we are often encouraged to quit if; there is some kind of risk, we are considered not smart or talented enough or if we try to save face from failing in our attempts. I have done my fair share of quitting things, because; they seemed too hard, I believed was not good enough or my efforts didn’t seem to be working. Looking back at those things, I will never know if I could have actually achieved the end results and been singing with joy, because I took myself out of the game prematurely. What about you? What is it you have quit too soon? What have you given up on and then justified to yourself was the right move to make, when deep down you regret not following through? Hard question, I know, but a critical one if you want to be singing with joy, the way you deserve to be.
You and I have been blessed with an incredible capacity that we rarely ever really explore, unless we are forced to. I want to encourage you, this week, to explore that capacity because you can and because you choose to. I was totally inspired by Derrick Kirk, my guest on this week’s podcast called, ‘It’s not over.’ Derrick was forced to explore his capacity as he was orphaned at 6 years old and homeless at 18. As a result of what he was forced to do to survive, he learned to believe and trust in his own capacity, and now chooses to do amazing things and impact the world in a big way. It is definitely a podcast worth listening to.
Winston Churchill, famous English Prime Minister, kept, as he likes to call it, ‘Buggering On.’ During WW2 the vast opinion in the UK at the time, was to give in to the overwhelming forces against them. However, Churchill stuck relentlessly to his decision, even as his sanity was being questioned, to ‘never, ever give up!’ History will show that his attitude that it was not over, and his iron-clad decision to keep going led to singing and dancing in the streets of London and other cities all around the world.
I played my first senior game of professional football when I was 18 years old in August 1983, and I played my second game, 20 months later, in April 1985. So, what happened in those 20 months? I played every game in the reserve grade team, I played well in almost all of them, and I missed selection week after week after week, for 20 months. What really happened in those 20 months? I made a decision to keep showing up, no matter what. Despite the fact there were many times I doubted myself, threw a tantrum and felt like giving up, I just kept going because I knew it was not over, until I was singing! In that time, I got better, stronger, fitter, more resilient, more determined, more mature and more equipped to be a professional footballer, In fact, the best time of my seven year professional football career, was the 20 months I missed selection every single week.
If you give up, you will never know what you can achieve. So, just know that’s it’s not over until you are singing, and, if you keep going with focus and determination, you will be singing, trust me. Keep going and you will be singing as you reach your wellbeing goals. Keep buggering on and you will be harmonising as you restore the relationship that is fractured. Make the decision, it’s not over until you are humming as a result of your business success, your financial achievement or whatever else it is you are aspiring to.
I say it often, and I will say it again, you are good enough to live the most amazing life you can imagine. The difference between those who do and those who don’t, is not luck, intelligence, ability, age, education or circumstances. Success is one hundred percent earned and owned by the people who know, in their heart, that it’s not over until they are singing. I wish for that you do some singing, as a result of the thing you persisted with, in the very near future.
by admin | 10 Oct, 2020 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
It’s been well over 30 years in the health and wellbeing industry for me, and I have to say I have pretty much loved every day of it. There have been some challenges, some frustrations, some poor choices, some direction changes and some uncertainty, but I have loved the journey, nevertheless. As I reflect on my time, and what I have learned in the process of helping people reach higher levels of wellbeing, there is one thing I know for sure. That is this; no matter what you put in your mouth, do for exercise or change with your lifestyle, optimal wellbeing is not possible if you don’t love yourself.
After everything I have learned about eating, exercise, and all the other physical elements of getting into shape, and what I have observed about people who are living wonderful lives of optimal wellbeing and those who are not, I now know for a fact that it is an inside job. I have seen far too many people, including yours truly, thinking they could eat and exercise their way to acceptance, validation and self-worth. I was a crazy over-trainer and extreme eater, worried that if I missed a training session, or put even the smallest piece of indulgence-type food into my body, it would show, I would ruin all my hard work and not be admired. I ate super clean, I trained regularly, and you would look at me and say, ‘That guy is super healthy.’ You may think twice, however, if you knew what was happening in my head and consequently in my body.
In my head were doubts about how I looked and concern that I would not be admired. In my body was fear, stress and anxiety that was wreaking havoc on my immune system, my DNA and the other hormones and physiological processes in my body. Let me tell you this, and I want you to hear it loud and clear; no amount of salad, vegetables, steamed fish or chicken can compensate for self-loathing, and, the stress, anxiety, fear and resentment it causes. So, are you ready for my prescription for optimal wellbeing and joyful longevity? Here it is; feed yourself love and actively move towards self-worth.
The way we eat and what we put into our bodies is often a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. The extreme way I was eating, was a reflection of my insecurity and need to be admired. In my recent podcast conversation, ‘Building a positive relationship with food,’ with Craig Harper, he talks about his young years as ‘a fat kid.’ He describes how, even though he knew he shouldn’t be eating it, he would consume three meat pies, because, and I quote, ‘It would make me feel f#@&ing amazing for 20 minutes of the day.’ He then when on to say, ‘for the other 1420 minutes of that day, I felt ashamed.’ Why did Craig eat the three pies? It was self-loathing. The only way he could get any comfort to ease his turmoil was in that instantaneous moment of gastronomic pleasure.
I would ask you to assess, not the food you eat, but the inner voice that moves you to the choices you make. It is a firm belief of mine that all food is good. Of course, some we should eat more of and some we should eat less of. But, make no mistake about it, the food is not responsible for the results you experience in your life, it’s the feeling that moves you to eat the food that will determine your level of wellbeing and the quality of your life. Three meat pies did not chase Craig down the street, back him into a corner, hold him down and force their way into his mouth. He chose to eat them, to help ease his feelings of self-loathing. Craig is now in a very different place in his life and eats in a wonderfully balanced fashion, which includes some indulgence. He does it naturally and normally, because he has learned to love himself.
I have moved from my extreme way of eating to a far more enjoyable and balanced approach, which definitely includes, chocolate, alcohol and all the good stuff. Why am I in a better place with my eating? Because I love me! It has taken time, it’s been challenging, but I can honestly say, I love and value myself and I am worth looking after.
Right now, as you are reading this, I would ask you to monitor your self-talk. What are you saying to you? When you ask yourself how you feel about yourself, what is your answer to you? This is the place to start if you want to live a life of joy, wellbeing and longevity. Feed yourself positive words, audios, blogs, books and feelings, and, when you do, you will start feeding yourself in a way that will fuel and fortify your body. This is a big topic that I have covered very briefly in this blog, but my message to you is that you are good enough and worthy to be loved. When you start feeling that way, you will love yourself to optimal wellbeing.
by admin | 3 Oct, 2020 | Andrew's Blog, Inspiration
There are storms in our life, literally and figuratively. In fact, at any one time, we are either in a storm, coming out of a storm or about to go into a storm. That just seems to be the way life is. COVID has been one of those storms. There are also financial storms, relationship storms, health storms, career storms and many other types of storms we deal with on a regular basis. The storm itself is not the problem, it’s how you respond to the storm that matters. I just heard a wonderful story about why it’s important to drive through the storm.
A man and his teenage daughter were driving home after a day out together. The daughter was learning to drive at the time and needed practice, so asked her father if she could drive. Being a supportive an encouraging man, he said, ‘Absolutely.’ They stopped the car, swapped seats and the daughter started driving. The father was very impressed by what an attentive and competent driver his daughter was. After a short time driving, big black clouds started rolling in and they could both see a storm coming. The daughter started to get a little concerned and asked her father whether they should pull over and wait for the storm to pass. The father looked at her and said, ‘No, we’ll be fine, keep driving.’ So, with his confidence in her, she kept driving.
Soon, the wind started blowing and the rain started falling and it was getting quite heavy. The girl, started to get scared said, ‘Dad, I think I should pull over and wait for the storm to pass.’ But again, the father said, ‘No darling, just keep driving through the storm.’ She trusted her father and God, so she kept going. It didn’t take long before the storm really started to reach its full force. There was thunder, lightning and the rain was pelting against the windscreen, making it difficult to see even just a few feet ahead. All the other cars on the road were pulling over and stopping. The terrified girl again asked her father, ‘Shouldn’t we stop? All the other cars are. It’s hard to see and I’m scared.’ The father, in the same calm and relaxed fashion, said again, ‘No, keep driving through the storm.’
Very soon they were through the storm. The rain stopped, the wind eased, and the sun started to break through the clouds. The girl was visibly shaken, but relieved and proud of herself, as she looked at her father, smiling. After regaining her composure, she asked, ‘Why did we keep driving through the storm dad, when stopping seemed to be the safer thing to do?’ The father requested that she stop the car at that point. They pulled over, got out of the car, looked back along the road they had just travelled, and the storm they had just come through, and he asked the girl, ‘Where are all the people who stopped?’ She looked quizzically, shrugged her shoulders and said, back there somewhere, in the storm.’ ‘Yes,’ her father replied, ‘they stopped and so they are still in the storm and will be stuck there longer. We kept driving and we made it out the other side.’
There are two powerful messages in this inspiring story. The first is to keep moving when you are dealing with a storm in your life. Don’t; stop, give-up, have a tantrum, start blaming, go into victim-mode or believe you aren’t good enough. Keep moving forward one step at a time, taking positive action and soon you will be through the particular storm in your life, whatever it may be. The second message is one I believe may be even more powerful. If the girl didn’t have her father by her side encouraging her to keep going, what would she have done? She would have stopped in the storm and been stuck in it for longer, right?
I heard this story last Sunday, and it really resonated with me this week, as I, like many, are travelling through the storm which is COVID19. I have often thought I just need to toughen up and get through it alone, but I have recently recognised that I have people around who have helped me through the storm. There is one person in particular, who has been an amazing friend and support, and has helped me enormously to drive through the storm. If this person is reading this, they will know who they are, and I say, thank you for sitting next to me in the car as I drive through the storm.
As for you, please find someone to encourage and support you as you keep driving through your storm, whatever that may be. In this week’s podcast, ‘Present – It’s your body.’ I speak to the inspiring Dr Kelly-Anne Garnier, who had to drive through many storms to become a General Practitioner. She now spends her time encouraging people, who need help with their mental or physical wellbeing, to present themselves to their GP, or other practitioner, to partner with as they drive through the storm to optimal wellbeing.
Life is a wonderful place, full of amazing possibilities that are waiting for you on the other side of the storm. All you need to do is to find a partner, a coach, a mentor or a friend and, with their support and encouragement, drive through the storm to the sunshine waiting on the other side.
