by admin | 30 Jul, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
I have had an awesome two weeks. I have travelled around Australia, speaking to some amazing people who work for an incredible global organisation about living their best life. Lots of things were discussed, from mindset to resilience to the power of routine and, like every organisation, there were people there who loved what they did to earn their income and others who needed some convincing. I asked them a question about how they considered their employment: is it a job, a career, or a calling?
If you are actively engaged in generating income for your life right now, I would like to ask you the same question. You may be asking, what does it mean and what does it matter? I am about to explain what it means, and what it matters is… everything! Let’s face it, for many decades of our lives, we can spend more than half our waking hours in an income generating pursuit, or pursuits. Do you know anyone who drags themselves out of bed and then painfully endures the day, every day, for years and years and years? I do. What a miserable existence. As I say time and time again, we only get one shot at this life and then it is over, and it’s far too short to spend doing something that has no meaning and does not bring joy. Wouldn’t you agree?
I am currently reading The Happiness Advantage, by Shawn Achor, and in it he discusses the difference between a job, a career, and a calling. They are worlds apart. There are people who work purely for money, and they endure their work simply for a paycheck. For them, it is a job. There are people who like what they do and feel their work is important. They have a career. Then, there are the far too few people who are passionate about what they do because of the meaning it has for them and the difference they feel they are making in the world. This, my friend is a calling.
The vast majority of people I spoke to over the last two weeks were mechanics and engineers who spend their time getting greasy, putting together and repairing bus and truck engines. It is gruelling work, the hours are long, the pressure to deliver is high, and the unexpected challenges that come their way are plenty. Even so, some of these people see what they do as a calling. Sadly, however, there are also many of them who see what they do as a job. So, I discussed with them how to move the meaning of their work through the job-to-calling spectrum.
I asked them to think about what they did, and how they would describe it to someone who asked them. Those with a job, said they fix engines, and it is frustrating and tiring work. I then asked them to think about the bigger picture and the ripple effect of what they did. At a basic level they fixed engines so the bus or truck could run smoothly, but what they were really doing was enabling the transportation of people and products around the country to places where they could make a difference.
They never saw beyond the bus or the truck leaving the workshop. The reality is that the buses moved people to reconnect with loved ones, to attend inspiring workshops, to do a job that would positively impact lives, or help people make a new start in their life. The trucks moved products that would help people be healthier, make people’s life easier, enable the production of new and amazing initiatives, and keep the world moving forward in a powerfully positive way. So, really what they were doing was being a critical link in the process that positively impacted millions of lives. This is how you can take a job and turn it into a calling.
How would you describe what you do for a living? If it’s a job or a career, can you see how to start moving it towards becoming a calling? The other day, I was out exercising at 6am when the garbage collector came to empty the bins in the street. As he stopped to empty a bin, I said, good morning. Thanks for what you do, it makes a difference and certainly makes my life easier. He initially didn’t quite know how to respond, but then said, thanks. The chances are he sees what he does as a job. Just a garbo. But he is way more than that. He keeps the city clean, he helps to keep people healthy, and he makes many people’s lives easier. He is making a massive difference. Even being a garbo can be a calling.
I want to challenge you to think about what you do, and see how, whatever it is, it makes a positive difference in the lives of others, even if indirectly. The difference between having a calling and having a job is worlds apart and will positively impact every area of your life. In my podcast this week with Tor Roxburgh and Patrick Bonello called Put some tech in your step, we discuss all of the amazing technology that is helping people to live healthy and happy lives. You make a difference. Your work is meaningful. If you really stop and reflect, I know you could take your job and move it to a career and then to a calling.
by admin | 23 Jul, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
Are you like me, and second guess yourself on a regular basis? Why do we tend to believe other people more than we believe ourselves? Why are we prone to take on board someone else’s interpretation of a situation, rather than just trust ourselves and know that we are enough? I know, these are some pretty full-on questions to get you thinking as we launch into this week’s blog. I have just recently learned a valuable lesson that has reinforced to me, that I can trust my voice and that I am enough.
As I am writing this, I am sitting on a plane somewhere over the Nullarbor Plain, between Perth and Melbourne. Here is a fun but useless fact, the word ‘Nullarbor’ means no trees. I am doing some travelling at the moment, sharing the message from my latest book T.E.A.R.S of Joy, to the different branches of the Australian arm of a global organisation. A week before my session in Perth, I was warned in no uncertain terms, that it would be a tough crowd. I was told most people would not want to be there, they would probably not engage, they would be very critical and pick my presentation to bits. So, as you can imagine I was a little fearful. A speaker’s worst nightmare is talking to people who are not interested, not engaged, critical, and vocal about it.
Don’t get me wrong, I am confident of my message, I am passionate about helping people, but I was scared. Why? I didn’t trust my voice. I started to doubt myself and was even thinking about some of the things I might say that would open myself up to criticism. I was internally tying myself up in knots. On the morning of the talk, as I was preparing myself, the nerves were high, but I stopped and had a conversation with myself. Andrew, just be you, go in there with a desire to connect with the group, be relevant and share from your heart. The right people will get the message, and if there are people there who are not ready to hear what you are saying, that is okay. Trust your voice, you are enough.
As I started talking, I was surprisingly calm. They seemed like a great group of people, and as it turns out, they were. The session went amazingly well, from my point of view anyway, and I had people coming up afterwards telling me they really enjoyed it. There was more people engaged at this session than the other ones I had done. I left feeling on a massive high. It was a vastly different outcome than the one I was warned about. The big question is, why? The leaders who warned me, knew the people who would be attending. How did they get it so wrong, in this instance? Simple, the people responded to me in the same way I spoke to them.
When I started talking, I did not see a tough crowd, I saw a wonderful group of people who, like all of us, want to live their best lives. I knew I could help them; I trusted my voice and spoke to them with a desire to make a difference. I believe they picked that up. I am not trying to come across as bragging at the moment, because there have been many times when I bombed badly in a talk. I think I have just got to the point in my life where I know what I know, and I trust what I know. I also believe every person has a heart for others and a desire to be the best they can be.
I am telling this story because I want to encourage you to trust yourself. We will often face challenging situations, and we will often get someone else’s opinion of the situation. Just know the only opinion that matters is your own, and you are good enough to deal with any situation that comes your way. So, trust yourself and your voice. Are you facing a situation at the moment that is causing you some angst? Why? If you were to think about it logically, and not so emotionally, would it be fair to say that you can handle it? All you need to do is have faith and trust that your voice, your resilience, and your capacity are enough to deal successfully with any situation.
In my podcast this week called Jump out into life, Josie Warren discusses how, within just a few months, she was totally clear of multiple auto-immune and mental health issues that she was told she would have to manage for the rest of her life. She did it when she realised that she held the answers in her own hands, and she trusted herself and her voice. It is an amazing podcast well worth listening to.
As you get up after reading this week’s blog and get into your life, I hope you will do it with a different feeling. Despite all the opinions of people and the world, if you would just believe in yourself, trust in your voice, and know you are enough, you will be amazed what will happen for you in your life. Trust your voice today.
by admin | 16 Jul, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
There are so many wonderful gifts we receive in our lifetime. As a child, I was always up at 4am on Christmas morning and my birthday, ready and waiting for the gifts I would receive. Then we start to realise gifts don’t always come as wrapped packages, sometimes they come in the form of friendships with great people, the incredible miracle and beauty of nature, and wonderful opportunities that come our way. There is one gift, I receive every day, that I am most grateful for, and that gift is a choice.
I made a lot of very poor choices after I was sacked from the St Kilda Football Club in 1987. I was a very emotionally underdeveloped 23-year-old when I read in a national newspaper one Saturday morning, two weeks after playing for the club in a Grand Final, that I had been de-listed. That is a nice way of saying sacked, dumped and discarded! As a result of that identity destroying event, my lack of perspective took my thinking down a very destructive path. I made some choices I am not proud of, and even regret a little today, more than 30 years later. As a result of the things I said and did, I destroyed any chance of furthering my professional footballing career, and so I will never know how good I could have been.
At the time, I didn’t believe I could choose a different response. I felt like all choice and control had been ripped out of my hands, and I was left feeling very hurt and very broken. In my mind, my reaction and words were necessary and justified. At that moment, I did have the gift of choice, I just didn’t use it wisely, at all. However, there is one choice I made at the time, I will always be grateful I did. As I thought about my football future, I made a choice that surprised many people, including myself. Most players, when they leave the top level of professional sport, find a club they can play with to earn money. I didn’t. I spend the previous seven years playing for a club that was lacking on-field success, and the pressure and stress that created was enormous. Interestingly, after I had my tantrums and the dust settled, the most overwhelming emotion I experienced was relief. I was relieved to be out of that stressful and toxic workplace.
I made the choice to get away from money and try to find the love of playing the game I had lost over the previous years. I chose to go and play for a club in an amateur competition for one year, and then go back and try my hand at playing for money. Well, that one year turned into twelve, and I finished my career at that same club, and it was the best choice I could have made. I made amazing friends, I experienced great success and achievement, and I learned wonderful lessons.
I could easily reel off a list of poor choices I have made and where they led me, but you would need a box of tissues and be depressed for weeks. So, I won’t. I have also made decisions I am proud of, that, at the time didn’t seem logical, but fit with the vision I had for my life. Deciding to write my first book at a time when I was working two businesses, seven days per week and was in close to $100,000 debt, makes no sense. I had no time, no skills, no qualifications, and no idea what I was doing, yet that choice transformed my life.
The great news is that you have the gift of choice and can use it every day, as often as you like. The first thing to understand and accept is that you are already using it, whether you know it or not. Everything you are currently experiencing is because of choices you are making or have already made. That me be a bitter pill to swallow – trust me, I know – but just know that anger, procrastination, blaming, self-loathing, victim-thinking, and any other destructive behaviour is a choice. You will have heard it and read about it many times; whilst you don’t always choose your circumstances, you always – yes always – choose how you respond to them. The other thing to know is that the life you experience has much less to do with those circumstances, and almost everything to do with how you choose to respond to them. That is the gift of choice.
If you are experiencing undesirable things in your life in any area: health, relationships, money, or career, then celebrate. Why celebrate? Because you created the situation through your own choices, which means you can make different choices and turn your life around, in a heartbeat. Let me tell you, in no uncertain terms, my life changed the moment I decided to write my first book. The circumstances I was facing at the time didn’t impact my future, it was the choice I made as a result of my circumstances that did. Isn’t that a great reason to celebrate? I believe so. What an incredible gift choice really is.
In my podcast with super 76-year-old grandma Lynne Bowman called Brownies for breakfast, she is very clear that optimal wellbeing and living a life of joyful longevity comes down to the choices we get to make every single day. So, my friend, I hope this blog has given you reason to rejoice. No matter what you are facing at the moment, you can make a choice that will change your direction in an instant. You are given the gift of choice every moment of every day, so, please, use it wisely. If you do, anything – and I mean anything – is possible. Enjoy the gift of choice today.
by admin | 9 Jul, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
The future is fantasy. It is make-believe and fiction. It is a figment of our imagination. The most important thing to understand about the future is that it never comes. Therefore, my question to you this week is, why do you spend so much time thinking about it, worrying about it, and trying to predict it, when it does not exist? There is only one moment in time that is real and, in your control, and that is this very moment.
In his quote from well over 2000 years ago, Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu stated that:
If you are depressed, you are living in the past.
If you are anxious, you are living in the future.
If you are at peace, you are living in the present.
In the second sentence he states that if you are anxious, you are living in the future. Why is that? Simple, we cannot predict our future, it is an unknown for every person, and spending any time trying to work out what will happen in the world, in your country, and in your life is a futile exercise. Anxiety is what happens when we focus on what we don’t know and cannot control.
You may be asking, what about tomorrow? That is the future, right? Yes, it is, however, it doesn’t exist until it turns into today, and then it is no longer the future, but, like right now, the only time you will ever have. In one of the greatest movies ever, Rocky 3, Rocky is struggling mentally and emotionally. His coach, Apollo Creed, is sparring with him and Rocky is not responding. Apollo yells, Damn it Rock. Come on. What’s the matter wit you? Rocky, in a dejected tone responds with, tomorrow, I’ll be better tomorrow. Apollo yells at him, There is no tomorrow! There is no tomorrow! There is no tomorrow!
Apollo knows it, I know it, and I am sure you know it. There is no future, there is only today. I am not saying you don’t need to think about things you are aspiring to have, do, or become in your life. I am not suggesting you don’t create a strong vision for what you want and set goals to move towards its realisation. I am saying, once the vision is clear and the goal is set, focus on the only time you have, and that is now. That is this very day.
I can tell you, I have spent too many years of my life dealing with anxiety. Always wondering and worried about how my life will turn out. Wondering whether I will make the team, be liked, be good enough, make enough money, be loveable, fulfil my potential, and be happy in my life. I spent so much time in the fantasy of the future I forgot to take control of the only time that would determine the path my life would take. Today! Are you relating to what I am saying? Are you fixated on what may happen in this crazy world in the future? Are you worried about whether you will have the life you want? While you focus on these things, you are missing your life as it is happening, right now.
The power you have, right now, to make decisions and take action, will, in this instant, change the course your life is heading. Is that what you want or are you happy with the life that is unfolding for you right now? If so, great, nothing needs to change. If, however, you are living with uncertainty and anxiety, and are sick of it, then think about what you can do now to start the process of change. If you read this and think, I will start tomorrow, I want you to imagine Apollo Creed yelling at you, There is no tomorrow! There is no tomorrow! There is no tomorrow!
If your health is suffering, start today. If you need money, begin now. If your relationship needs attention, get into action in this moment. If your career is ailing, your business is stagnating, your book is stuck, you joy is on hold, then start now to take your life in the direction you want it. It is up to you. No-one else is responsible or at fault. Everything you will experience in your life moving forward, depends on what you do today, whether you feel like or not.
In my podcast this week called, From pain to purpose, I speak with Keagen Hadley. Keagen went through incredible physical and emotional pain as an athlete and was stuck in life waiting for his future to just improve, until he realised nothing would happen unless he took immediate action. The result is a man who is ‘supremely passionate’ (his words) about what he is doing to positively impact lives.
Can I suggest you eliminate the word ‘future’ from your vocabulary? Why? Because the more you focus on it, the more you will stay stuck in the place you are in. The future is not real. It will never happen as it is imaginary and mythical. The only thing that is real is you and the only time you have any control over is now. Please don’t file this blog away as an interesting read. Please take notice and do something you need to do, NOW! I just want you to know, deep in your heart, there is no future, only today.
by admin | 1 Jul, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
It can be easy to believe that our mood and attitude are influenced by the situations and circumstances we experience on a day-to-day basis. It sounds counter intuitive that it’s possible to be happy when you are facing challenges, problems, and adversity in your life. Well, like many things we don’t necessarily like taking responsibility for, happiness is a choice, and it’s a choice you can make every day – no matter what is happening in your life.
If I am being fully transparent, I have been going through a tough time emotionally for a little while. Several things in my life had compounded to the point where I was feeling a little helpless, very alone, and fearful that I may be spiralling into a dark place. There is an amazing quote that says, “There is not enough darkness in all the world to put out the light of even one small candle”. Well, that small light came to me in the form of a book I had already read once, but though it may be an opportune time to revisit. That book is The Happiness Advantage by Shawn Achor.
In just a few days it is hard to explain the difference I have noticed in my life and the transformational change that has occurred. I am still only very early stages of the book, but the few things I have implemented have reinforced to me that happiness is not luck, chance, or circumstantial, instead happiness is 100% a choice. In the book Shawn discusses, in researched detail, why it is happiness that leads to success in life, NOT the other way around, as we have been led to believe. In the early stages of the book, he outlines a few very basic things we can choose to do on a daily basis to immediately increase our happiness. So, I thought, I have nothing to lose.
Of the things he mentioned, there were two I decided to add to my daily routine. One was a five-minute meditation, and the other was a random daily act of kindness. Now, again, as I am writing this, I have only just started doing this, and it is very early days. However, something happened inside me the other day that is worth sharing in this blog. The meditation for me is challenging, as I have a very active mind, but I am doing the best I can. It was, however, the random acts of kindness that have impacted me more profoundly.
The first day of this new routine, I went to the local café, walked up to the counter, and handed the server a $10 note. After a short pause and a confused look on the man’s face, I asked if he could use that money to pay for the next person’s coffee, tea, or purchase. He took the money gratefully and assured me he would comply with my request. I walked away with a warm feeling in my heart and a smile on my face. I definitely felt happier. The next day, I was wandering around the local shopping centre looking for an opportunity to do something for someone when I walked past a lotto kiosk. Hmm, I thought, I wonder.
I went up to the counter and was greeted by a nice man and I asked him to help me choose a $5 scratchie. My thought was that I would buy it and then find someone in the shopping centre to give it to. Just as I was making the payment, it came to me. He processed my payment, handed me the scratchie and then I handed it back to him and said, this is for you. I got the same confused look I had received the previous day, but as I assured him I was serious, he was very grateful. I walked away and something happened inside of me. Suddenly, out of nowhere, I felt an overwhelming emotion take over my body and I started bawling. Yes, in the middle of the shopping centre. The feeling was joy, the feeling was fulfilment, the feeling was happiness. I am already addicted to random acts of kindness and believe even more than ever that happiness is absolutely a choice.
Many things will bring immediate happiness and they are all things we can choose. Kindness is a choice. Meditation is a choice. Encouragement is a choice. Focusing on things you love is a choice. Gratitude is a choice. Thinking of things you are looking forward to is a choice. Exercise is a choice. Associating with positive and happy people is a choice. These are choices you can make every day and they will transform your life. In just the last few days I feel very different about my life, and I have a totally different perspective about myself and the things that were taking me down that dark path. I feel truly and deeply happy. The same is available for you, right now.
I had an incredible conversation with Jem Fuller on my podcast this week, called A fly on the wall. It was about communication, self-awareness, ego, and self-worth. Again, the focus of the discussion was about the choices we can make every day that will lead to happiness. I think it would be fair to say that we all want to be happy. I don’t anyone who states that their major goal in life is to be miserable. That being the case, and if you are struggling to find happiness, then simply stop searching for it and choose happiness today.
by admin | 25 Jun, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity
This may be the hardest question in the world to answer. It has taken me five decades! You may look at it and think, that’s an easy one and define yourself as a mother, a father, a business owner, an athlete, a student, a manager, a lawyer, or any other description of what you do or role you play. Or you may portray yourself as fit, lean, wealthy, popular, married, or other achievement or status. But here is the deal, none of those things are who you are. So, I ask you again, who are you, really?
The biggest challenge with attaching your identity – which is what we are really talking about here – to something you do, something you have or something you have achieved, is that you can lose it. If it’s a job, a career, or a title, what happens if you lose it? If it’s money in the bank, the material things you own or the way you look, again I ask, what happens if you lose any of those things? What happens, as in my case, if it is an achievement? For me, as an insecure young boy, teen, and a young man, I attached my identity and self-worth to the recognition, validation, and admiration I received as a professional athlete.
For seven years as a professional footballer, from the age of 16 to 23, I felt strong, confident, admired, and happy. I was actually kidding myself that I was happy, but that’s another story. It all came crashing down around me in October 1987 after I read in the sports section of a national newspaper, two weeks after playing in a grand final for the club, that I had been de-listed. To put it in more brutal terms, I was sacked, and I read about it in the newspaper. That identity, the thing that gave me any semblance of self-worth, was now gone in a heartbeat and I was crushed. I spiralled and it took me a long time to pick myself up from that and move on. But even when I did, I didn’t learn the lesson.
I then attached my identity to my body and worked obsessively hard to gain and maintain a body that people would admire and love. I never stopped to think about what would happen as I aged, and my body would not be the same. In addition to that, I attached my identity and self-worth to how hard I worked and how much money I made in business. Well, again, that collapsed around me as I worked over 100 hours per week, in two businesses, over a two-year period, to find myself in close to $100,000 debt. My self-worth took yet another nose-dive as I could not hang on to the things I believed defined who I was.
I am glad I now know who I am, and it has nothing to do with what I have, what I do or what I have or will accomplish in my life. Who I really am lies deep inside of me and it can never be lost, stolen or broken. I was speaking to a group of teenagers at a high school last week, and the very first exercise we did was call ‘I am’. I made it clear to them that they were not a score, not a grade, not smart or stupid and not talented or untalented. I handed out a sheet of paper, with the words ‘I am’ at the top and I asked them to write the words, values and character traits that describe who they were. Things like; kind, courageous, compassionate, loving, giving, caring, funny, curious, spontaneous, persistent, generous, adventurous, trustworthy, loyal, joyful, optimistic, empathetic, faithful, vulnerable, gentle, patient and so on.
What do you notice about these descriptions of who you are? They are deep inside you, a part of your DNA, and they can’t be lost, stolen, or broken, ever. Too many people focus on being popular as their identity, yet if they just focused on being kind, giving and generous, they would automatically be popular. Lots of people focus on the achievement of something to fuel their self-worth, yet if they just focussed on being curious, courageous, adventurous, patient, and persistent, they would achieve everything they aspired to. I spent so much time thinking that being in a loving relationship would help me and my identity, yet I found myself in and out of far too many. If only I focussed on my compassion, empathy, loving and caring nature, I wouldn’t have had to worry so much or experience so much heartache.
Coming back to my original question, who are you, really? Hopefully you now know how to answer it in a way that will allow you to have, do and become everything you want in your life. In my podcast with Stacey Copas this week, called Feel every moment, Stacey talks about how she lost the life she thought she wanted when she ended up a quadriplegic at the age of 12. Now she knows who she is at the core and, even though in a wheelchair, is one of the most joy-filled, passionate, and powerful positive influencers I have ever met.
What about you? Are you ready to let go of the need to look good, achieve more, work harder and have more to fuel how you feel about yourself? Are you ready to re-define who you really are? Are you ready to look at the values and character traits you have, deep inside, that you can never lose? If you do, you will discover who you really are and that you are already good enough to fulfil the incredible destiny you have been put on this planet for. Spend time right now answering the question: who are you, really?
