by admin | 29 Dec, 2023 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
The thought of getting up at 5am to exercise is rarely a pleasant one. The time in preparation to make that phone call when rejection is probable is often one of fear. The lead up to the conversation you know you need to have can be terrifying. The period before the audition, presentation, performance, or interview is always uncomfortable, as the fear of failure is high. We have all experienced this, however, my question is this; how do you feel in the moment after the discomfort?
Christmas Day should be a time of joy, peace, happiness, and togetherness. So, why was I so terrified as I drove to have lunch with my family? I will tell you why. There was a moment of discomfort coming, and I was uncertain and a little bit fearful of the response I would get. However, it was important for me to make a statement to my family as to where I am at in the spiritual area of my life.
I became a born-again Christian about 6 or 7 years ago. It was a decision I made when my life was in crisis, and I was looking for answers. A great mentor and trusted friend suggested that I explore Christianity, and if it had been any other person, I would have probably disregarded it. I am grateful every day that I listened to her and followed through, as my walk with God has changed my life for the better in so many ways.
I have always felt like I am a bit of a black sheep in my family. I believe it is because I have chosen not to follow a mainstream path in different areas. As much as I love them, I have got used to the fact that rarely do I ever get asked about certain things. I think they knew I was a Christian; I don’t talk about it with them a lot, because of the fear I have about how they may respond. However, something happened to me in the Christmas morning service a few days ago. God spoke to me and said, “It is time Andrew”.
So, as I was leaving church and heading to lunch, I knew it was time, but I was ‘pooping my pants’ a little! I was rehearsing in my mind what I would say, and I was mulling over the different responses I may get. You know what it’s like, our mind often goes to the worst-case scenario. Well, my mind did, and I realised that, no matter what, I would survive, so, the decision was made. I arrived at my sister’s home, and the normal banter and light conversation happened, and just as we were about to sit down to eat, I knew it was time. I am not ashamed to say, I was scared. I asked for everyone’s attention. They all looked at me as if to say, ‘Oh no, what is he going to say?!’
I simply said, in a nervous voice, and certainly not as polished as I had rehearsed it in my mind, “Since the foundational meaning of Christmas is the birth of Christ, and since this is an important part of my life now, would anyone object if I prayed for us?” There was no objection, for which I was relieved and grateful, so I went on and prayed a prayer of thanks for God, for Jesus, for my family, and a blessing for the people less fortunate. After it was over, we sat down, ate lunch, and had a nice time. There were several hours of fear and uncertainty in the build up to this moment of discomfort, but as soon as it was over, I felt relieved, proud of myself, and very glad I did it.
Isn’t this the truth with any uncomfortable situation? Don’t we build things up in our head, far worse than they will ever be, and then in the moment after the discomfort we are always glad we did it. I am always proud of myself for getting up at 5am and exercising. I am always feeling more confident after I make the phone call. I am always feeling stronger after having the conversation. I am always excited for the next adventure, after the one I have just had. The point is simple, don’t let fear, doubt, or discomfort stop you, because you know you will always feel amazing in the moment after the discomfort.
In my podcast this week with Kate Martin called Push through discomfort, we discuss the amazing gifts that will come from getting through to the moment after discomfort. The movie We Bought a Zoo was on TV the other night. My favourite line in the movie, spoken by character Benjamin Mee to his teenage son, is, “All you need is 20 seconds of insane courage, just 20 seconds of embarrassing bravery and, I promise, something great will always come of it”. No truer statement has been made. Use that 20 second of insane courage to get you through to the moment after discomfort. You will be so glad you did.
by admin | 7 Dec, 2023 | Andrew's Blog, Joyful Longevity, Mindset
I am going to stick with the theme I have had going for the last couple of weeks, because God keeps reminding me of the importance of it. Of what? Of today. Of making the most of the moment we are in and not wasting a second of the precious life we have been gifted. As you read this, it is today. What a genius I am! My question is, what are you doing today to make it count? What will bring you joy, move you towards a dream, or make a difference in someone else’s life? Do it now and ‘slay the day’.
As I was walking home after my training session the other day, there was the sign, on the path in front of me, written in big and bold letters, Slay the Day. Now, let’s get this clear, and in the context of this blog and the modern day meaning of the word, I am not referring to the dictionary definition of the word ‘slay’ which says, to put to death with a weapon, or by violence; hence, to kill; to put an end to; to destroy. For the sake of this blog, we need to look at the origin of the modern-day interpretation of this word.
The slang use of the word ‘slay’ emerged from the innovative LGBTQ+ community. Specifically, it originated in the underground ballroom scene of 1970s-80s New York City. This subculture featured voguing dance battles, runway walks, and fashion competitions among houses formed by Black and Latino LGBTQ youth. To “slay a ball” meant to completely dominate the competition. So, that is what I am talking about when using the word ‘slay’; to dominate, to win, to overcome, to create, to influence, to help, to inspire, and to make a difference. So, now, when I say to you, Slay the day, I hope you get what I mean.
I guess, even in mystical and mythical medieval times, slaying a dragon was really a metaphor for achieving a dream, overcoming an obstacle, or exploring human potential and capacity. So, it really has a similar application in the context of this message. What I am saying is, in a very convoluted way, make the most of this day. A couple of weeks ago I wrote a blog called, It is still 2023, because I could see, hear, and feel people switching off and missing the rest of this amazing year. Last week, my blog was called, There is always something you can do, because I want you to know that, in this moment, there are great options available, even if things seem hopeless. This week, in the same vain, I want to reinforce winning the day, or even better, slaying the day.
It simply means, whatever you are doing today, do it with every morsel of enthusiasm, passion, and focus you have. As I am writing this blog, let me tell you, sparks are flying off the keyboard. I have several Zoom meetings today, and the people who I speak to are going to get the best of me. I am cooking dinner for someone very special in my life this evening, and I am going to prepare and cook it with love. You see, slaying the day is not limited to killing a dragon, to amassing a fortune, to breaking a trauma-bond, or anything else that seems overwhelming and intimidating. In the context of this blog, Slaying the day, means giving everything you have to everything you do.
Are you doing any cleaning today? Do it with gusto, knowing that when it’s done you will have a clean home. Are you going to the gym or doing some exercise today? Do it with zest, knowing that it is increasing your mental and physical wellbeing and inspiring someone else who may be watching. Do you have to spend time with challenging people today? Do it with delight knowing that your presence will help them in their lives. Do you have to complete a difficult or tedious task today? Do it with relish knowing that when it is done, other people’s lives are going to be enhanced. In fact, do everything you have to do today with spice and sparkle, and slay the day.
When you slay the day and do everything with passion, you will love your life, inspire others, and attract more amazingness to you. In my podcast this week called, Show up as you, I speak with Chris Walker about this exact idea. How do you transition from Alcoholism, depression, and stroke, to joy, abundance, and purpose? Simple; get good at slaying the day. This is an awesome conversation with Chris.
Today is here and now, and there is no other time you will ever have. It won’t magically get better in the future. It won’t suddenly change when the new year arrives. It won’t just mystically appear when you wake up in the morning. There is only one way to get what you want, be who you want, and do what you want, and that is, focus on the only time you will ever have and, slay the day.
by admin | 1 Dec, 2023 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
We have just entered into the last month of the year, and as I spoke about in last week’s blog called, It is still 2023, there is time left this year to do something that could impact your life now and into 2024 and beyond. It is so easy to switch off at this time of the year and just go with the festive season flow. However, I want to encourage you to make today count by simply remembering, there is always something you can do.
It is supposed to be summer in Melbourne, Australia, but the last week here was anything but. It hasn’t stopped me from my morning regimen of exercise. Yes, I am one of those crazy people who gets up and out to training, rain, hail, or shine. Actually, come to think of it, you can cross off the hail from that list. There has been wind and light rain pretty much all week, and the temperature has been mild, so it has been bearable.
The other morning, I was training by the beach, and it was a very windy morning. The water was quite rough and certainly not looking that inviting, so I stayed on dry land. Well, dryish land, that is. As I was training, a guy stepped onto the beach, walked towards the water, got undressed, and headed out into the water for a swim. I was thinking, I am glad I am me and not him right now. He started swimming and I got on with my training and didn’t think too much more about him, until about 20-30 minutes later. I had finished my workout and was about to head home when I saw his stuff on the beach. It prompted me to look out into the water and try to see him.
I scanned the water, but there was no sign of a swimmer anywhere. I tried to convince myself that he was fine, and I started walking home. But I didn’t get very far as in my mind I was concerned. I looked to the water again, with more focus this time, and still there was no sign of him. I was playing worst case scenario situations in my mind. Is he lost, did he drown, or did something else happen to him? I couldn’t leave. There had to be something I could do. It was 7am, windy and a little rainy, so not many people around. The lifesaving club was right there but seemed closed. I walked around, knocked on doors, all to no avail. So, again, I resigned myself that there was nothing I could do, so I started walking home again.
However, that same voice spoke to me, there is always something you can do. Yeah, but what? I thought. I didn’t have my phone with me, so I couldn’t call anyone, but I looked and saw a guy in a sweeper vehicle, so I walked over to him. I explained to him the situation, and he called his supervisor, but there was no answer. Just as this was happening, a guy in bathers and a swimming cap was running down the beach towards the clothes that were laying there. Could this be him? I thought. I waited to see if he stopped at the pile of clothes on the beach, but alas, he ran straight past. Again, believing there was nothing more I could do, I started heading home, and again, I stopped myself.
I watched the guy running, he got to the end of the beach and turned back. Maybe he is the guy, I thought. I started walking towards him, onto the beach, and up to him, and asked, Is that your stuff laying there? He said it was, and a great weight lifted off my shoulders. I explained to him what I was thinking, and he was incredibly grateful that I had noticed, and cared enough to actually do something. I walked home, feeling proud of myself. What did I really do? Not much actually, but I did something.
I think what I did was more for my own peace-of-mind than anything else, because this guy was fine and in no danger at all and totally oblivious to the angst I was experiencing. It just reinforced to me, that no matter what, there is always something we can do. So, as you think about this day, this week, and the rest of this year, I want you to ask yourself, what can I do? When you feel like leaving things till 2024, stop and know, there is always something you can do. When you see someone struggling in some way, there is always something you can do. When you think about relationships you have, there is always something you can do. When you think about your job, career, or business, there is always something you can do. When you think about your wellbeing, there is always something you can do. When you think about something you are trying to finish, learn, or change, there is always something you can do. So, just do it!
In my podcast this week called Let your heart be broken, with musician and composer, Tina Davidson, we discussed the things she did and is doing to create beautiful music, overcome traumas in her life, and have a positive impact on the world. Thinking about stuff, putting things off, and just talking gets nothing changed or created. You actually need to do something and, trust me, there is always something you can do.
by admin | 24 Nov, 2023 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
It is definitely getting there, but the year is not over yet. I keep seeing posts on social media including, Bring on 2024, and having conversations with people who are saying, I can’t wait till this year is over. Don’t get me wrong, I think it is smart to start planning and preparing for a new year, but I want to remind you that it is still 2023.
I used to be that person who thought, when I achieve a certain thing then I will be happy. I used to say, I can’t wait for training to be over, then I will feel accomplished. I have been known to utter the illogical words, it will all be better tomorrow, next week or next year. I have even thought, whilst writing my blog, when I have finished this, I will feel great. What I have missed, with this very flawed mindset is… everything! When I just wanted to be somewhere in the future where I believed things would magically be better, I missed the amazing joy, meaning, and purpose that exists there in every single moment.
Can I be honest with you? That’s a loaded question, isn’t it? We think we want the truth until we realise that it shines a light on us to expose the flawed thinking we may have and the poor decisions we may be making. I am going to be honest with you anyway, and if it causes you to stop reading this blog, then that’s a chance I am willing to take. When I was a bring on the new year, or I can’t wait till the year is over or when I have this then I will be happy kind of person, nothing changed. I stayed stuck, frustrated, and in a cycle of ‘suckiness’. Inevitably, when that time in the future became the present, I was no happier, no clearer, and no closer to what I wanted. I just pushed it out further into that mystical and non-existent future.
Why do I say the future is non-existent? Have you ever experienced tomorrow? Have you ever existed in next week? Have you ever lived in next year? No, you haven’t, nor have I, nor will we ever. Because, in every case, when that time comes, guess what we have? Yes, you guessed it, we have today, and we only ever have today. That being the case, my attitude now is, let’s make the most of the only time we have. That time is right now.
I think it is great to set goals for a future achievement, and I am a firm believer in creating a vision for a life I want that I don’t yet have. What I now know is that what happens in 2024 for me is determined by what I do today. I have had a great year in 2023, and whilst it would be easy for me to take my foot off the pedal and just cruise into 2024, I know that there is still lots of magic left in 2023. Maybe you have had a year in 2023 that you would like to forget to this point, then forget it. But please don’t wait for the new year and think everything will magically be okay when the clock strikes midnight on December 31.
Why not make the last month or so of 2023 count. You never know, even after 11 crappy months, the last month of 2023 could be the one that makes you reflect on the year as your best one yet. What can you change? What could you start doing? What could you stop doing? Who could you speak to and ask for help? Who can you help? The things you could do every moment of every day leading all the way to the last minute of 2023 are actually mind-blowing. The outcomes they could help you create now, and in the future, are limitless. Malcolm X, human rights activist, said, The future belongs to those who prepare for it today.
In my podcast this week called Direction can change, I talk with Jacob Smith about his transformation from a turbulent upbringing, gang life, and on the verge of prison to totally changing his stars. He knew that he could not put off living a better life for one more second, and his immediate actions started him on the path to joy, purpose, and abundance.
Life is so short, and each time we put something off or wish for a time in the future to arrive when we hope things will be better, we are effectively flushing our precious time down the toilet. Please for your own sake, cancel your membership to the Thank God it’s Friday Club, remove yourself from the Things Will Be Better When Club, and join the Today is the Only Day I have and so I am Going to Make it Count Club. Maybe we should just shorten that to the Do it Now Club. If you are reading this part of the blog, then you have courage. I applaud you. Now, I urge you to take that courage, turn it into immediate action, and do everything you can while it is still 2023.
by admin | 11 Nov, 2023 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Life is a wonderful adventure, if you view it that way. Life is jammed packed full of experiences of every variety, and all of which, with the proper perspective, can improve it immeasurably. The greatest mistake I have made in my life is trying to avoid failing, when failing is the only way to experience the greatest joys in life. So, are you ready to start failing successfully?
Wow, that sounds like a contradiction, doesn’t it? How can you fail successfully? That all depends how you define failure. For the sake of this blog, I will define failure as; things not working out the way you would have hoped. Have you ever noticed that when you try and avoid failure, as I just defined it, you either do nothing or try something very carefully and fail anyway? The problem with the perfectionism mindset, of which I am grateful not to have, is that the best way to avoid failure is by not trying it at all. Hence, many people give up, or never start in the pursuit of something uncertain because of this fear of failure.
What I would like to suggest is that you actually re-imagine failure as a successful step on the journey to creating any outcome you desire. That being said, and based on many years of spectacular failure, I would like to share some thoughts about how to successfully fail. As you may know, I am now a best-selling author of eight published books with number nine and ten on the way. There is no doubt that my greatest claim to fame was the impressive failure that started me on the journey.
At the time, I was working seven days per week, with two businesses, including a massively failing café that was losing money every day to the point of $100,000 debt. Then, out of desperation and looking for a solution to my circumstances, I made the illogical decision to write my first book. That $100,000 debt seems like a massive failure, however, with the perspective I have now, I know that it was actually a very small investment in the life of joy and abundance I currently live. That being the case, I deeply believe failure is actually a very good thing and can be the catalyst for incredible transformation. It all depends on how you look at it. Life is full of failure; losing money, rejection, other people’s opinion, missed opportunities, low scores, and losing stuff. Is it really bad? Is it devastating? Is it failure? Or, is it the only way to success?
The reality is that everything you want is on the other side of failure. Have you ever attempted something significant and got it exactly right on the first go? If so, it probably wasn’t that challenging or meaningful. Getting a date with that person you want is often littered with rejections and refusals until you get the date, and even then, you may have to work hard to create a relationship. I know that getting a book published doesn’t happen on the first submission, or the fifth, or the tenth, or even the twentieth. Selling your service, your idea, or your product will require massive failure before you achieve any real success. The truth is that the more you fail, the more you will eventually gain in return.
Probably the most important thing you will gain, even beyond finally achieving your desired result, is experience, lessons, and perspective. These are invaluable if you want to live your best life, and they only come through failure. So, get excited about failing, and do it more often. When you try something and it doesn’t work, you can review, modify, improve, and try again. When you get rejected, you can learn better ways to deal with people to get the desired outcome next time. When the worst-case scenario happens, you realise you will survive and even get stronger in many ways. These are all invaluable assets that you can only acquire through failure. So, fail fast and fail often.
Learning to love failing is just a decision. We all start with the ability to fail, and we all have failed at least once to this point in our life. The next stage is to start to develop a willingness to fail. Only 20% of people ever get to this stage. It is, however, the final stage, which only 5% of people get to, that will help you create abundance. That is a wantingness to fail. If you truly believed the faster you fail, the faster you will get where you want to be, then wanting to fail would simply become a natural position.
In my podcast this week with Dana S. Diaz, called Words always win, we discuss the power of words to determine the life we ultimately want. When we change the words we use around failure, then we will start to believe that failing forward is the only way to achieve the greatest life we can live. Make today the day you decide to start failing successfully.
by admin | 3 Nov, 2023 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Life is a wonderful adventure, filled with amazing opportunities and incredible possibilities. Is that how you feel? Do you wake up in the morning bouncing with passion, purpose, and power, or is the snooze button your best friend? No matter what you answered, I want to encourage you to open your mind, your heart, and your eyes to an amazing life. Are you with me? If so, we just need to get four pieces in the right place and then all systems are go.
As I am writing this blog, I am sitting many thousands of metres above the ground as I fly from Melbourne to Sydney. It is one of those wonderful times of the year when I attend a weekend conference to help me refresh my vision, surround myself with inspiring humans, renew my mind, reset my focus, and refill my cup. I can’t wait. Like you, I have dreams and aspirations in my life that at times get blurred by challenges, distractions, and discouragement. So, for me, these weekend events every four months, are essential.
I used to think that once I had a dream, I would be good to go out and make it happen. I was wrong. I used to believe that a knowledge of the process was enough to move me to the fulfilment of my dreams. Again, I was wrong. I used to imagine that once I had set a goal, I would simply achieve it. I couldn’t have been more wrong. I understandably felt that consistent actions would predictably lead to the outcome I desired. Yes, but there is a condition. So, then, the question must be asked, what is it that will help me move forward to live the life of my dreams? Interestingly, as important as the dream, my goals, and my actions are, who I am at the core and who I believe myself to be, seem to be the foundation of all joy, happiness, health, meaning, and success in life.
There is no doubt about it, we need a dream and a vision for our lives. Without a clear vision of how you want to live in every area of life and a daily reminder of how important it is to you; nothing will change in your life. It is also very true that without specific goals to attain measurable steps along the way to fulfilling that vision or dream, it will be more of a wish than a dream that will remain in your imagination. There is no doubt that without the consistent and daily application of specific and relevant actions, to the point of unconscious habits, no goal will be attained nor dream fulfilled. However, the most neglected and most important part of this process, is who you truly believe yourself to be. In other words, your identity.
The person who is trying to give up smoking but doesn’t already identify themselves as a healthy person, will probably struggle in their quest. The person who is determined to write a book but doesn’t think they are good enough will derail themselves at some stage. The person wanting to be in a fulfilling relationship yet doesn’t feel worthy or loveable, will sooner or later sabotage the relationship. I know this one from painful and heartbreaking experience. The key to changing your life is to change the view of yourself, or simply remind yourself of the incredible person you already are.
The only thing that stops me in any aspiration, is me. It is the lies I tell myself, and they are lies. When I think I am not good enough, it is a lie. When I believe I am not smart enough, another lie. When I believe myself to be unworthy, a big fat lie. However, whether they are lies or not, and they are, it is what we believe that will become our truth. So, the key thing is to start believing the actual truth about who you are. Are you ready to do a simple activity? If so, write down three or four of the most powerful, positive, and meaningful character traits you already believe about yourself. Not what you would like to develop or become, but those you already firmly believe you have in spades. For me, I know I am courageous, kind, honest, and emotionally mature.
It is one thing to identify and write these down, it is another thing to own them and use them to drive our choices and actions. So now, every time I look at my dreams, goals, and the actions I need to take, I ask the question; what would a courageous, kind, honest, and emotionally mature person do in this situation? I answer the question, and off I go. Whenever I face an obstacle, I ask the question; what would a courageous, kind, honest, and emotionally mature person do in this situation? The answer helps me find a solution, and off I go. If someone criticises me, judges me, or hurts me, I ask the question; what would a courageous, kind, honest, and emotionally mature person do in this situation? The answer helps me face the situation with perspective and compassion, and off I go. Whenever I am feeling tired, discouraged, or stuck, I ask the question; what would a courageous, kind, honest, and emotionally mature person do in this situation? The answer gets me re-energised, refocused, unstuck, and off I go.
It is this identity which is the foundation of every action I take, and keep taking, which leads me to achieving the goals that move me towards the vision I have for the dream life I choose to live. In my heart I know who I am, and I want to encourage you to spend time building this foundation for yourself because you deserve to live the life you dream of. The process is simple; visualise the dream, set the goal, take the actions, and back them up with a strong identity and sense of self.
