by admin | 9 Apr, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
When I finally left school, I was happy because, at the tender age of 18-years-old, I thought my days of learning were done, and that I knew everything I needed to know. If you are a parent of a teenager, you will understand what I am talking about. They think they know it all! I certainly did. What I didn’t realise at the time, was that my education was only just beginning and would continue every day I am upright and looking down on the grass. Some are fun lessons, some are annoying lessons, and many are hard lessons, but all need to be learned.
The first hard lesson I learned, just as I had left school thinking my education was over, came on a football field as I played my first senior level game of professional football. The game started with high hopes and finished with me in a hospital bed after being knocked unconscious, carried off on a stretcher, and taken to hospital in an ambulance. As I lay there with a bashed in head, feeling sorry for myself and my parents begging me to give up the dangerous sport I had chosen, I realised I had a choice to make. Do I give up because it’s dangerous, or get up because in the pursuit of any dream, there is a chance of getting knocked down in some way? I chose to get up, and let me tell you that was the best choice I could have made as it has positively impacted every area of my life since. It was a hard but critical lesson I needed to learn.
That was about forty years ago, and this week just gone by, I learned another hard lesson. I had got myself into the habit of not answering phone calls if I didn’t recognise the number. If I am being honest, it’s because I didn’t want to have to deal with sales calls or other uncomfortable situations. My position and justification have been always, if it is important, they will leave a message. So, many calls happen every day that I would ignore and choose not to answer, never knowing what they were about or where they may have led. Big mistake! I would wait for the message to come through, and if it didn’t, I would just simply forget about it.
On Tuesday I had a call come through, and it was a mobile number I didn’t recognise so I left it. No message came through, and I simply forgot about it. Two hours later the same number called. I assumed it must be a sales call, so again, I left it. No message came through, and I forgot about it. On Wednesday, I looked at my phone and noticed a message I hadn’t seen before, so I listened, and as I did my heart sank! It was a message left by the person who rang twice on Tuesday, but for some reason the message hadn’t come through, or I hadn’t seen it until Wednesday. The message was from the representative of an organisation looking for a speaker, on short notice, for an off-site meeting happening on Wednesday, the actual day I was listening to the message.
I immediately felt sick in my stomach as I had missed a paid speaking opportunity because of my reluctance to answer phone calls. I beat myself up for a few minutes, I had a tantrum and pity party and then I asked myself the question, what is the lesson here? The answer came straight back at me, Andrew, you need to answer every single call that comes and return every single call you miss, even if you don’t recognise the number, because you don’t know what amazing opportunity may come from it. For a few seconds I stopped to think about the thousands of calls I had missed and how many of them may have been incredible opportunities if I just had the courage to answer the call. I stopped that thought trail pretty quickly because it was futile and would just depress me.
I have vowed that I will answer every call no matter what. If it is a sales call, I will simply say no. If it seems a little dodgy, I will just hang up. If it is an opportunity, I will jump on it. I am now excited every time the phone rings because I am expecting something great to come from it. It was a hard but incredibly valuable lesson to learn.
John Maher, my guest on this week’s podcast called, One more cuddle, learned the hardest lesson there is. Twenty-six years ago, he lost his 18-year-old daughter in a car crash when she fell asleep at the wheel. Since that time, with a broken heart he will carry for the rest of his life, he speaks in schools and to companies about the devastatingly hard lesson he learned to help people avoid the same tragedy. He is an inspiring man, who has just published his first book, and is impacting lives all around the world.
As you move through your day, and do what you need to do, hard lessons are going to come your way. They may seem horrible, even heartbreaking, but they can be the greatest blessing in your life. All you need to do is take the time to understand what happened, learn the lesson, and use it to enhance your life and the lives of others. Learn the hard lesson today.
by admin | 2 Apr, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
I believe we live in a world that is incredible. It is a world where people are wonderful, opportunities are plentiful, and anything is possible. I also believe, for the most part, we have been misled and mis-informed about what is a successful life, and what it really takes to live that life. We have been sold the idea that success is more about education, money, status, looks and achievement than it is about joy, love, and fulfilment. We have also been sold the mindset that any achievement takes talent, intellect, money, pain, and sacrifice. Well, I am here to sell you a different idea. The concept of… just one more!
I want to share just two personal and very simple examples to explain what I mean. Both affect my health and wellbeing; one is my daily step count and the other my crazy muscle-up obsession. I used to struggle to do 10,000 steps per day. In my mind, it was about as good as I could get, based on my daily activities. Don’t get me wrong, I think 10,000 steps are amazing, however, I got to the point when I decided to up my game. Fast forward to today where I am consistently doing 20,000 steps per day with seemingly no more effort than it took to do 10,000. How? Simple, just one more.
I never really set the goal to do 20,000. To me it was not achievable, however, I set the goal of just one more 1000 steps per week. That is just an extra 140 steps per day, nothing! Over time and with the ‘just one more’ attitude, I started to do more, believe more and now I comfortably do at least 20,000 steps every day. What’s the difference between 10,000 steps and 20,000 steps per day? Well, it’s not 10,000, that’s for sure. It is 70,000 steps per week, 3,640,000 steps per year, which equates to over 3000km (or 1900 miles) per year. That is the power of just one more.
I have spoken about muscle-up Saturday before. When I started, I couldn’t do much more than 50 in a session. This morning, I did 251. I have followed the principle of ‘just one more’. Each week, I added just one more set of 5, and it’s taken a couple of years to get to this place. Even this morning, when I started, I was overwhelmed by the thought of 251, but I knew I could do just one more. So, one muscle-up at a time, I achieved the target. Let me tell you, the benefit has been much more than the physical outcome and the blisters I have on my hands (which I wear as a badge of honour!). The greatest benefit is the power of the mindset that I have developed, and the understanding that anything I want, anything important and anything great is possible, if I follow the approach of ‘just one more.’
In my podcast this week called Play a bigger game with Kate Strong, she talks about many inspiring things. One of the many achievements she has enjoyed is being a world champion triathlete. When she started, she struggled to run half a mile. In two years, she was a world champion. Do you want to know how it happened? She simply followed the approach of ‘just one more.’ Just one more run, just one more kilometre, just one more stroke, just one more pedal, just one more hour and just one more day. With this simple and consistent process, she did what many would believe impossible. Anything is possible if you do just one more.
Where are you at right now? What are you doing, and where are you heading? Important questions to ask, for sure. Do you understand how dramatically your life could change if you were able to add just one more? One more what? One more of anything that will move you closer to your best life. What about just one more hug for the people you love? Can you imagine the impact that would have over one year if you just hugged the person you love one more time each day? How about one more phone call to meet someone, sell your business or set up an appointment? That would be an extra 360ish calls per year. Can you imagine what results that would bring? One more snack, one more step, one more word, one more message, one more dollar into savings or one more of anything that will help you. The power is not in ‘the one more’, the power is in the compounding effect of the commitment to ‘just one more’ each day. You can do that, can’t you?
I was excited to be asked to be on a national morning TV show recently to talk about my new book T.E.A.R.S. of Joy. It didn’t happen because I am an author. It didn’t happen because I played professional sport. It didn’t happen because I am talented, intelligent, lucky or know the right people. It happened because of ‘just one more’. I had sent out many emails to media people, and I decided on a particular day to send out ‘just one more’. Here is the email I received after this ‘just one more’:
“Your other emails must have either been stopped by the email gatekeeper or totally missed. My apologies. What a terrific story of transformation and turning things around. Probably a story of hope that a few hundred thousand people could do with right now.”
What are you missing every day because you are not living the ‘just one more’ life? Can I encourage you today, and every day that you are privileged to be upright and looking down on the grass, no matter how much you have already done, to just add one more! I look forward to hearing the stories that will come from this approach to life.
by admin | 19 Mar, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
The most devastating affliction I am fighting against every day at the moment is not COVID or any other physical ailment. I am currently at war against the dreaded perfectionism disease. I am trying to heal and reform the people who say things like, I didn’t do anything because I was scared it wouldn’t be any good, if I am not good at it, I won’t do it, if it’s not perfect then I am not good enough, and I have to get it right first time. This is going to sound weird, funny, or even counter-intuitive, but I want to encourage you to aim to get it wrong the first time!
Get what wrong? Not everything, that’s for sure. If you are about to jump out of a plane for the first time, make sure you have done everything you need to do to get it right, the first time. However, even when jumping out of a plane, if you have ever done it, how many safe jumps did you make and how much did you practice before you went up in the plane? I am sure your first jump was terrible, right? How was your first attempt at walking? Perfect the first time, or a spectacular flop? How about your first attempt to ride a bike, kick a football, play an instrument, or make a sales call? Perfect? Or breathtakingly off the mark?
We know this logically, don’t we? The truth is, it is impossible to perfect anything on the first attempt, so why do we beat ourselves up mercilessly, judge ourselves critically and then make crazy decisions to give up on important things because we couldn’t get it right the first time? I am glad I do not have this character trait. I am proud of my averageness and imperfection, and I am excited about getting things wrong the first time. And the second, and the third and the fourth. I also know that my level of ‘wrong’ reduces with each attempt I make and eventually know I will get it right. How many attempts and how long does it take? As many attempts as required and as long as I need. I don’t care. I have one goal and one goal only, and that is to get the job done. To get something right, you have to be excited about getting it wrong the first time.
I am currently working with many aspiring authors, and I would have to say, tragically, the ones who have given up on the journey are the ones who resolutely hung on to the belief that if they couldn’t get it right the first time, they never would. No matter what I would say to them, no matter what evidence I would give them and no matter what made logical sense, they would give up on something that could have been one of the greatest joys and opportunities in their lives. If you are squirming as you are reading this, then this blog is for you. If you are tempted to stop reading, then hold on until the end with everything you have. If you fit into the perfectionist, I must get it right the first-time category, then this is possibly the most important message you can ever read, if you want to love your life, that is.
Go and talk to anyone who is doing what you would like to do, has achieved what you would like to achieve or has what you would like to have and ask them if they got it right the first time. If you find anyone who says yes, please let me know because I want to talk to them! We look at people who do things so seemingly effortlessly and incorrectly assume they were perfect, right from the beginning. Ha! They were just as clueless and incompetent as you believe you are. They just aimed to get it wrong the first time, knowing that with each imperfect attempt, and with resolute persistence, they would finally get the result they wanted.
This is my story to a tee; with everything I have achieved. I don’t know anyone more average, incompetent, or clueless than me when I started out in pursuit of the things I am grateful to have achieved. Getting it wrong never bothered me, however, not giving it a go always did. I now celebrate getting things wrong because it means I am moving, learning, evolving, and succeeding. In my podcast this week, called Actually living the dream I speak with Kara Bitar. She got it wrong for many years, as a lawyer, before she got it very right in terms of finding her passion and purpose in life. Now she is actually living her dream.
As always, today is a new day. You get to start afresh and change your attitude about what success and happiness represents for you. In my life, I now know that getting it right first time is neither success nor real. So, that being the case, I hope you will go forth with the attitude that getting it wrong the first time is the outcome you want. Embrace it, learn from it, and try again. Watch what happens in your life.
by admin | 12 Mar, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Have you ever told yourself that there are some things you just can’t do? I am pretty sure we have all done that. My question is, if you haven’t tried before, how do you know? We often put a lid on our potential and we limit our capacity by limiting beliefs that have no basis in what is actually true for us. You can spend as much time in your mind as you like hypothesising why you can’t do something, or you can just give it a go. Capacity is not a physical thing, or a willpower thing, it is a state of mind thing.
I have recently been challenged in my own thinking about capacity and inspired by a young man who has effectively taken away all my excuses for not believing in my potential. In my podcast this week called Run for wishes, with Sean Bell, my thinking was radically expanded, and I hope this message does the same for you. I won’t go into the whole story, you can listen to that, however, what I do want to tell you is that you can do far more than you are doing, and possibly think you can. Me too!
Sean, after losing a close friend at the age of 18, decided to honour his friend and raise awareness and money for charity and made the decision that he would run 50 marathons in 50 days. Yes, you read that correctly, and I also wrote that correctly… 50 marathons in 50 days! That is one marathon every day for 50 days! There would be many people, possibly even me if I am being honest, who would say that running 50 marathons in 50 days is not physically possible. There would be many educated people who could go to lengths to prove that the body is not capable of withstanding that volume of effort for such an intense period. The muscular capacity, the ability to recover, the body’s energy systems and the human capacity would all be stretched, pushed, and punished to the max. So, even with the science, and even with the opinions of many people, how did Sean do it? In fact, as you hear him talk about it, you may also ask, how did it do it so seemingly easily? The answer, capacity is a mindset!
The body will go where the mind believes it can go. Now, don’t get me wrong, there was comprehensive preparation involved, both mentally, physically, and nutritionally to be able to do it. The bottom line, however, was that Sean believed he could and then decided he would. As we were talking about how he was able to do it, he said the most important thing he required was an impenetrable ‘why?’ He asked himself the following question: What are ten reasons why I will achieve this audacious goal? He made a list of ten powerful reasons, and each day he got up to prepare for his next marathon, often feeling like going back to bed, he read this list, and knew why he would successfully do it again on that day.
I resonated so much with what Sean was saying, as I reflected to the moment, whilst working seven days per week in two businesses, when I decided to write my first book with no time, no skills, no experience, and no qualifications. If it wasn’t for a clear vision and many compelling reasons I would not be where I am today, living the amazing life I live. Capacity is a mindset, and your potential is unlimited, so I hope after reading this blog, and listening to the podcast with Sean, you will set your sights on something that scares you.
You see, the achievement of an audacious goal, or seemingly impossible aspiration is not in reaching the finish line. It lies in the simple steps you take every day. Sean just focused on the next lamppost, not running across the finish line of his 50th marathon. I just focused on the few words I would write every day, not a 50,000-word manuscript that was required. When you focus on the weight you want to lose, the money you want in savings, the book you want to write, the marathon you want to finish, it can be so easy to come to the erroneous conclusion that you can’t do it. When you focus on the daily steps required, and commit to keep going, you will soon know, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that you can do it. Whatever it may be.
Sean Bell is now on the verge of running from Cairns to Melbourne, a distance of 3700 km. He calls it Run for Wishes and is raising money for the Make a Wish Foundation. He will be running on average 60km for 60 days to raise $60k! How can he do it? Simple, he has a strong reason, he will be ultra-prepared, he will just focus on one step and one day at a time, and because he knows that capacity is a state of mind.
by admin | 5 Feb, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Sometime my mouth goes off without my brain engaging! Do you know what I am talking about? Something happens, someone says something, I don’t get what I want, or things don’t go the way I have planned and, before I know it, words have come out of my mouth either to myself or someone else, I wish I could take back. I still have to learn when to keep my mouth closed.
I had a podcast conversation with the amazing Tammy Van Wisse, world record breaking marathon swimmer, a couple of weeks ago. If you didn’t hear it, I recommend it whole-heartedly. She has swum over 65000km in her career, including: the English Channel, the Bass Strait, Loch Ness, the length of the Murray River (Australia’s longest river), New York to New Jersey, just to name a few. She also swam in and won a race around Manhattan Island in New York. Before this particular race all swimmers were warned that there was a sewerage plant on the course, and to take a wide berth when they got near it.
I don’t know about you, but if I was swimming near it or through it, I would be keeping my mouth firmly closed with no chance of any of that sewerage getting in. In fact, as Tammy and I were chatting, she said, when you are swimming through the shit, keep your mouth closed! Now, this is not just great advice for swimmers swimming through sewerage, but also a great metaphor for life. There are many times in life when we could use the analogy of swimming through sewerage, right? You may be swimming through some unpleasantness as you read this. If you are, take it from Tammy… keep your mouth closed.
When we are going through challenging times, we tend to become more vocal. Have you noticed that? However, often the stuff we vocalise is not useful. In fact, often it is damaging to ourselves and others. Has someone ever said or done something that you perceived as offensive or insulting, then responded with a verbal barrage that you later regretted? We have all done that. In hindsight, don’t you agree it would have been far better to keep your mouth closed? Have you ever tried something that didn’t work and started telling yourself how inept and useless you are? I believe we have all done it, and again, it would have been preferable to keep your mouth closed. Have you ever found yourself going through challenges and adversity as you aspire to create a result? Yes, we all have. Have you ever found yourself verbalising and justifying why it would be better to just give up? At that moment, it is definitely time to keep your mouth shut.
We are the creators of our own destiny. In other words, we are the captains of our own ship. Whether that ship sails into a beautiful sunset or into an iceberg depends on your willingness to keep your mouth shut when you are navigating through the storm. When it is so tempting to say something defensive, aggressive, or insulting, bite your tongue. When the urge is strong to complain, blame or justify, sew your lips together. When your natural tendency moves you to declare you are not good enough and that giving up on your dream is the best option, please for your own sake, close your mouth.
This is a simple but powerful message I hope you are getting. In my podcast this week called, Other side of the mic, with radio announcer Elerrina McPherson, she explains the challenges as she pursued her dream to be on radio. Trust me, she swam through an ocean of sewerage, and despite the challenges, the negative opinions of others and the time it took, she just kept her mouth closed and kept swimming. She is now living her dream and impacting many lives.
Even as you read this blog, you may be wanting to open your mouth and declare that it is rubbish, won’t work for you or why you can’t do it. Please for your own sake, keep your mouth closed. You can do, become or have anything you set your mind to if you: are clear on what you want, get into action, keep going – even when the sewerage comes – and, keep your mouth closed.
by admin | 29 Jan, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
I am on a mission in 2022 to help myself and others win. Win what? Win in life. Win in our hearts. Win back self-worth and self-love. Win with others. Win fulfilment. Win meaning. Win love. Just win in your world. Not only do I want to help people win, but I want them to win each day with each action they take, no matter the outcome of that action. We live in a world that teaches a win-lose approach to life, so I want to introduce a win-win alternative.
I have already spoken about new years resolutions, and how they put enormous pressure on people to achieve a goal or outcome that they perceive will make them happy, healthy, admired, or successful. The greatest challenge I see with this type of approach is that it leads to a win-lose situation. In other words, if I achieve my goal, I win and if I don’t, then I lose. The other challenge I see, is one I have experienced many times in my life. That is, the achievement of the goal does not lead to happiness, health, admiration, or success. There is no way that any external achievement can fill the internal void that most of us have.
That is why I coined the phrase, new year’s restitution as an alternate way to approach 2022. The definition of ‘restitution’ is, the act of restoring to the rightful owner that which has been taken away, lost, or surrendered. If we have a void within us, such as lack of self-worth, self-belief, confidence or love, no amount of external goal achievement will change it. And, if it does, it will be short-term. So, the way to restore what has been taken away, lost, or surrendered and create long-term inner joy, happiness, fulfillment, and success is to shift the focus from the win-lose outcome to the win-win process.
If we shift our focus to taking action every day, then two things will happen. Firstly, it is a no-lose situation, because simply taking the action is a win. So, each day, maybe multiple times every day, you get to enjoy and celebrate the feeling of winning. Secondly, by committing to daily action, and continuing to act each day, the things you want to achieve will happen predictably. When I decided to write my first book, I was working over 100 hours per week in two businesses. So, to be very honest, the thought of writing whole book was intimidating and overwhelming. I knew, however, I could write a handful of words each day, and that became my strategy and focus. I wrote a little bit, I felt like a winner, I celebrated, and I did that each day. Guess what happened? With that focus on the simple win-win action every day, I ended up with a book. It was not luck, talent, ability, or willpower. It was winning each day.
With each day that I acted, doing what seemed like an insignificant amount of writing, my confidence grew, my self-belief was being restored and I started to regain the self-worth I had lost. Not only that, but I became an author and transformed my life. It didn’t happen in a day, it happened day-by-day. There were days when I didn’t feel like it. I did it anyway and celebrated. There were days when what I wrote was terrible. I did it anyway and celebrated. There were days when I didn’t know if it would ever be finished. I did it anyway and celebrated. No matter what, the action I took was the win.
The action you take will always be a win, even if it doesn’t return the result you want. I mean, you may be making phones calls to sell, book, or connect that go horribly wrong. You will learn something. That’s a win, so celebrate. You may audition for a show, go for an interview for a job or send a manuscript to a publisher, and get rejected. It will build your resilience and determination, and help you find exactly what you are after. That’s a win, so celebrate. No matter what the action is or what the outcome, it is always a win-win situation, and will always lead to what you ultimately want in life… joy, happiness, fulfillment, and success.
Are you ready to make 2022 a win-win year? Then all you need to do it focus on the actions you take each and every day. In my podcast this week called, Going the distance, with world record breaking marathon swimmer Tammy Van Wisse, she talks about how her amazing achievements in swimming happened just one stroke at a time. The same will happen for you. Let daily action be the win, and then, as a result, enjoy what you predictably create in your life. Trust me, this is a game-changer. Celebrate winning today.
