by admin | 16 Sep, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Have you ever set a goal? Me too. Have you ever missed a goal? Me too. Are there goals you have set and reset, and are still yet to achieve? Me too. We all know the importance of goal setting, I hope. Without a focus point and a time frame, nothing great can or will be accomplished in this lifetime. So, knowing this, why do we fail to achieve many or most of the goals we set? I think I may have inadvertently stumbled across the answer over the last few weeks.
I believe the greatest enemy of most of the goals we set is the lack of immediate consequences. There are definitely long-term consequences for missing most goals. Missing a health and fitness goal may not significantly impact in the short-term, but could be catastrophic down the track. Missing a financial goal may not immediately change too much in our lives, but may lead to financial ruin over the long-term. So, because many goals do not confront us with an immediate do-or-die kind of outcome, it can be easy to put off what we need to do to achieve the goal. Therefore, the answer to goal achievement is simple, and I will explain what I mean by this powerful and exciting achievement that has just happened for me.
Just over a week ago I bought a home. Less than three weeks before that, it was not even a thought in my mind. So, how did I go from not even thinking about buying a home, to decide, shopping for, finding, and buying one in under three weeks? Great question. The answer is simple and is the key to all goal achievement. There was no other option.
I moved to a rental property at the end of last year (2021) to be closer to my dad and return to the hood I grew up in. It has been great to be back. As of August 2021, I had been in the place for 9 months and so the thought of moving again was a long way off my radar. Until choice was taken from me, that is. I received a notice to vacate from the agents, with no explanation why, and was directed that I had to be out by November 25, 90 days later. The thought of renting again was intolerable to me, so in that moment, I knew this was a sign and it was time to buy. I now had a very clear and very urgent goal with a non-negotiable deadline.
My goal was to find, buy, settle, and move into a home by mid-November to give me time to get out of and clean my rental. I had no other option but to do this. There were no allowances, but serious consequences for missing this deadline. You should have seen me go. I was, and still am, a man on a mission. Over the next two weeks, I attended conservatively forty open for inspections, believing in my heart I would know the place when I saw it. I just had to see lots. I certainly saw lots of what I didn’t want, and then on a Saturday which I attended eleven opens, just two weeks after receiving the notice to vacate, I found it. I viewed it again on the Monday, put in an offer that day and it was accepted on the Tuesday, less than three weeks after this whirlwind began. I will be in my new place and out of my rental one month earlier than my November cut-off.
The point is this, it was not the goal that drove me to make this happen. It was the fact that I had no option but to make it happen, or I would be homeless. Therefore, this exciting event has taught me a massively important lesson about the key to goal achievement. Remove the options and it will be done. So, the question you need to ask as you set your next goal is, how do I make it non-negotiable and remove all other options, before those options are removed from me?
You see, people who continually set and miss wellbeing, financial, relationship, business, or other goals, will one day be faced with a do-or-die situation. The most important question, again, is how do you create that do-or-die situation before that point? How do you make it intolerable to miss the goal you set? When you come to the decision in your mind that there are no other options other than achieve the task by the set date, then the job is done. All that’s left is the work. That moment I looked at that notice to vacate and knew I had no other option; the job was done. Then the exciting work had to happen and trust me, it was an exciting adventure, and still is. When you decide to make something great happen in your life, the work is fun and meaningful, and the result is predictable.
Annalise Jennings, my guest on this week’s podcast called Drop the rock, is an inspiring example of this. Two years before she even knew why, she was moved to register a company called Dynamic Exchange. Then, seemingly by accident, an opportunity was presented to her to help her understand why and go on to impact many lives, in a dynamic exchange. She did something that didn’t make a lot of sense, but for her, she had no choice but to do it.
Success, achievement, joy, and abundance in life is available to you, and it is not as hard as many people think it is. Visualising and figuring out what you want is not hard. Setting a goal to make it happen is not hard. Even the daily actions you need to take to achieve it are not hard. The hard work, and the key to goal achievement, is removing all options and making it non-negotiable before those options are removed for you. Make the decision to achieve great things today, and then enjoy the exciting adventure that awaits.
by admin | 9 Sep, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Have you ever been on a seesaw? Of course you have, and it was great fun, wasn’t it? That is, unless of course you were on it with someone who was much lighter or much heavier than you. If they were lighter, then you hit the ground with a thud, and had to do all the work to try and start seesawing. If they were heavier, then you were stranded in the air with legs dangling out of control. The only way you can enjoy seesawing with someone of a vastly different weight is to move the fulcrum.
What is a fulcrum? You may be asking. The Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary definition is, the support about which a lever turns. In the case of a seesaw, the fulcrum is the support in the middle of the board which allows it to move up and down based on the forces applied at either end. I hope I am not confusing you, as I am starting to confuse myself! You can visualise the seesaw, right? As the support is exactly in the middle, a seesaw relies on people weighing about the same at either end to provide the most enjoyment. When the weights are different, the only way a seesaw could provide an equal experience for both riders is if the middle support, or fulcrum, is moved towards the heavier person. I am not going to get into the science of how this works, you need to just trust me on this one.
In other words, in this situation, the only way we can have an equal and enjoyable experience is to simply move the fulcrum. You may be wondering why I am talking about fulcrums and seesaws. I was reading about this analogy in the book The Happiness Advantage, by Shawn Achor, a book I have spoken about before. In it, he discusses this concept in terms of mindset and perspective. He talks about a study done with hotel maids at seven different hotels whose job it is to clean rooms in hotels, after guests have departed. At an initial glance, this may not seem to be a very fun, fulfilling, or joyful experience, with the exception of the few dollars they are paid per hour. Unless, of course, they moved the fulcrum.
Half of the maids were told how much exercise they were getting every day through their work, how many calories their daily activities burned, how similar vacuuming is to a cardio workout, and so on. The other half were given no such good news. At the end of the experiment, several weeks later, it was found that those primed to think of their work as healthy exercise had actually lost weight and lowered their cholesterol. They had done nothing different to the control group. The only difference was how their brains conceived of the work they were doing. This is what can happen when you move the mindset fulcrum.
I have had a very exciting week, and it all manifested very quickly. Less than three weeks before this wonderful event, I had, out of the blue, been handed a notice to vacate my rental property in 90 days with no reason or explanation. I have only been here 9 months, so I was shocked, but also excited. I moved my fulcrum very quickly from trying to find another rental property to buying a home. My audacious goal was to find, buy, settle, and move within the 90-days. A seemingly challenging task, depending on where the fulcrum is placed. As a result of the movement of my fulcrum to believing and expecting it would happen, I found and bought an amazing place within 3 weeks and will settle and move with 30 days to spare.
The question you may be asking is, how can you use this analogy in your own life? It is simple and powerful. Let’s say you have to attend a meeting you know will be a boring waste of your time. Could you move the fulcrum and go into that meeting with the intention of learning at least one thing about the topic, the presentation, or the way to run a meeting? You may have to deal with a person you don’t like or get on with very well. Could you move the fulcrum and focus on one trait about that person you do like, or respect? If you dislike exercise and it is a barrier to you doing it regularly, could you move the fulcrum and focus on how you will feel when it’s done, and the long-term benefits? When confronted with your next conflict, instead of thinking about how it affects you, could you move the fulcrum and think about how it must feel for the other person?
You see, your mindset is a fulcrum, and it is very simple to move when you choose to. In my podcast this week called Radical generosity, with Bob DePasquale, I was inspired by a man who has moved his fulcrum many times as he has dealt with some massive challenges. He now devotes his time to radical generosity and helping others do the same. My message this week, as always, is very simple. When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at will change. Move the fulcrum and see what amazing things will happen for you this week.
by admin | 2 Sep, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
The astronauts on Apollo 13 were in serious trouble. Their craft was profoundly wounded by an explosion and hurtling through space at 25,000 miles per hour. They were going to miss returning to earth by 40,000 miles, sailing off forever into the void of space. Their only hope of survival was a precise mid-course correction. Amazingly, by working together with the Flight Director and his team of experts at mission control, they managed that course correction with stunning precision, saving their lives.
So, what was that mid-course correction? It must have been pretty massive to get the Apollo 13 back on course, considering it was 40,000 miles or 64,000 km off course. Surprisingly, not! It was just a few short blasts on rockets on one side of the spacecraft that shifted its direction a few degrees that did the job. Just a seemingly minute shift, created a miraculous outcome. It is this shift that is available to all of us at any time, and will radically – just as happened with Apollo 13 – change the destination we are headed.
You can make shift happen in any area of your life and it will, over time, create just as incredible a result as the one achieved by the famous spacecraft. My shift story happened this week. As I have written about before, my beautiful fluffy daughter, now in her fourteenth year, has had some serious health challenges this year. She has steadily declined to the point that I was starting to lose hope. She was not eating well, rarely pooping, and getting weaker by the day. My heart was slowly breaking as I was trying to imagine life without her to come home to, snuggle with, and enjoy her quirky behaviour.
My attitude was shitty, my mood was flagging, and my actions, to be honest, were pathetic. I definitely needed to make a shift happen. I slapped myself, metaphorically speaking that is, and gave myself a good talking to. I knew she was responding to me and my feelings, so I needed to make a mid-course correction. The first shift was to change my thinking, then treat and talk to her as if she were healthy. The second shift was one simple action. She had vitamins sitting in a container on the bench and nutrient powders sitting in the fridge. I thought to myself, they are helping no-one in the container. So, I resolved to put nutrients into her little body every day.
I crushed the chewable tablet she didn’t like eating into a fine powder, I added the other powders from the fridge and stirred them all in together. Then I grabbed Joia, and even though she hated it, resisted it, and tried to get away from me, I placed the powder in her mouth, on her tongue and gums until she had taken it all. Well, most of it anyway, as she was trying very hard to spit it out. Afterwards, she had red lips from the beetroot powder, but those nutrients were in her body and doing good.
Would you believe it? That same day, her energy was better, she ate more, and she did a great poop. I am sure you are glad I am telling you about her bowel activity. Sorry! I have done this every day since, and that one little shift has had an amazing impact on her, and me. That’s the power of the shift. There is a great saying that goes, when you change how you look at things, the things you look at change. It’s just a shift. Two questions for you. What do you want to change in your life? What simple shift can you make happen that will have the greatest impact on that change?
Do you want more energy? Could you make the shift eating breakfast each day? Do you want a stronger relationship? Would you be willing to make the shift to giving sincere encouragement or compliments each day? Want more business growth? What if the shift was a simple as making one extra call per day? Want to feel more joy in your life? Could you make the shift writing a short gratitude list each day? Can you see how just a small mid-course correction can have a significant impact on your direction in life?
What if the shift you made was saying yes, and, instead of yes, but? I had a wonderful podcast conversation with Simone de Haas called Yes, and. Just this small shift in language can open up incredible creativity and possibilities in life. You see, you don’t have to settle for a life you don’t love. In fact, an incredible life is waiting for you, and it is just one small shift away. Make shift happen this week.
by admin | 26 Aug, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Have you ever forgotten to take your luggage with you on a holiday? I am guessing, no. Why? It is essential. Have you ever lost your baggage at any time whilst travelling? How did you react? Panic? Anger? Fear? Helplessness? Why? Again, your baggage is essential. As humans, we all have baggage, yet we often judge it or are judged by it, when actually, our baggage is essential to our story and our life. It is uniquely our own and needs to be looked after, just like our travel luggage.
We are encouraged to hide our flaws, deflect our mistakes, stay silent about our poor choices, and mask our imperfections. We feel like we need to be perfect or flawless to be loved and accepted. We keep getting told to let go of our baggage and start afresh. We have been urged to forget the past, turn over a new leaf, and be the person we have always wanted to be. The problem with this strategy is that it is not possible. You are you, warts and all. You can’t change your past, you can’t run from your mistakes, and you can’t let go of your baggage. Why would you want to when your baggage contains treasures that are uniquely yours and can be used to make your journey through life more meaningful and satisfying?
Let’s go back to the travel analogy. Now, there are definitely times we overpack and end up lugging around suitcases that are heavier than they need to be, as they contain things you won’t use on your trip. We have all been there, right? But was it really that much of a hassle? What if you did need it? You would be grateful that you packed it. You see, that’s the thing about baggage. At some point on your journey all of the contents are needed to help make your adventure as enjoyable and meaningful as possible. If you had gone to the snow, but decided not to pack your warm jacket because it took up too much space, you would at some point regret that decision. You would either be really cold or have to spend a large amount of money to purchase another jacket.
The contents of your baggage are essential, right? Imagine your trip with only one pair of shoes, no deodorant, no passport, only one shirt, no jacket or just one pair of undies. I am confident you get what I am saying here. Your baggage is essential. I want to encourage you to now think about your flaws, imperfections, poor choices, and the events you would rather forget, the same way: as essential baggage. You may be asking how that stuff could possibly be essential. That, my friend, is an amazing question which I shall attempt to answer.
I have more ‘baggage’ than most. Or, at least, as much. Daily mistakes, uncountable poor choices, truckloads of insecurities, many imperfections, and an embarrassing number of cringeworthy moments. But I love it all and it is essential because it is what makes me, me. Not only that, but it also helps me in every area of my life. Without my baggage and knowing why it is essential, I would be stressed, anxious, unhealthy, unfulfilled and without joy and purpose in my life.
It is my baggage which makes me relatable to people (as we all have baggage), and therefore helps me build stronger and more trusting relationships. My baggage helps me be more empathetic, understanding, and forgiving to others. Being able to be honest about my baggage and remove the mask that I have spent so much of my life wearing, has brought an incredible level of self-acceptance, self-love, and peace into my life. My baggage provides me with tons and tons of incredible lessons and opportunities to learn more, adapt more, and become a better man. For me right now, the best thing about my baggage is that it helps me to make a difference in the lives of other people. Can you see why I believe my baggage is so essential? The same applies for your baggage.
I had a wonderful conversation with Elise Peck on this week’s podcast called, Mutual weirdness. We talked a lot about embracing your quirks, imperfections, and weirdness, and when you do, you meet someone who connects with you. This may lead to, as Dr Seuss says, falling in mutual weirdness, more commonly known as love.
My main message this week is to stop hiding, running from, and being embarrassed about your baggage and embrace it. You can’t replace dumb things you have said or done, you can’t remove your imperfections, you can’t unmake mistakes, and you can’t change your past. Why would you want to when they are there to help you be you, help you learn, and help you live the best life you can live. So, from today onwards, embrace your baggage because it is essential.
by admin | 19 Aug, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Here are some facts about opinions. Everyone has them, everyone believes their own opinions, and rarely, if ever, are the opinions of different people about the same thing matching. The most important thing you need to understand about opinions is this, the ones you listen to and are influenced by will determine the outcomes in your life. So, make sure you listen to the right opinions.
So, which are the right opinions? In my mind it is very simple: the opinions that will lead me to what I want, no matter how unlikely or illogical that choice may seem. Would I be sitting here as a bestselling author had I listened to the ‘logical’ and ‘reasonable’ opinions of many other people? Not in a million years. I don’t know if my English teacher is still alive today, but if she is and knew that I was now a best-selling author, she would probably die from shock. If she is dead, I am sure she would turn over in her grave. I struggled to barely pass English in Year 12, with a lack of natural ability and interest. Had I asked for her opinion about me becoming an author, I can pretty much predict her words. They would have been logical, well presented and maybe even with some concern for my future, but would it have been the right opinion?
When I started to realise I didn’t want to live the life that education was leading to, that society was portraying, and that the ‘norm’ seemed to be living, I encountered many conflicting opinions regarding my choices. You may have discovered that already in your life. As I looked around the world and my own circle of associations, I saw people living a life that I didn’t want. Many were in careers they hated, and always stressed and cranky. Many were struggling with their health, weight, and energy. Many were living hand to mouth and only just surviving financially. As I looked at these people, I recognised two things. The first was that I did not want to live like them. The second was, if I listen to them, I will live like them. It was in that moment when I knew that I needed to be very careful about whose opinions I paid attention to.
It is incredible how people, including myself, are so attached to their opinions. Have you noticed that? If not, try to argue with someone you don’t agree with and see if it changes their mind. It is said that people convinced against their will are of the same opinion still. In other words, if someone has a conflicting opinion to yours, the chances are that it will never change. So, stop trying to change people, and instead avoid them if their opinions are contrary to what you want. I continually repeat this statement to myself, whenever someone tries to share their uninvited wisdom with me, If I listen to them, I will live like them. I then look at the life they are living and ask myself, is that what I want? If the answer is yes, I invite and open myself to their opinions. If the answer is no, I run from them as far and as fast as I can. Can I encourage you to do the same? If you really want what you want, that is.
So, the question remains, who has the right opinions? There is a group of people you know, or can find, who are those people for you. There are some important criteria that people must meet if they are to be on my trusted advisors list. First, they must genuinely and unconditionally want only the best for me, no insecurities or agendas. Second, they must be either living a life, or on the path to be living a life I want to emulate. Third, they must support and encourage my aspirations in a positive way, no matter how illogical or far-fetched they may be. Finally, they must challenge me to be better and hold me accountable to do what I need to do to have what I want. Anyone who does not fit this profile, is someone I will disengage from when they offer their opinion. It sounds harsh, but it is my life and I want it to be the best it can be. I am sure you want the same.
In my podcast this week, called Show up as you, I speak with Nikki Barry, who had to battle many demons and many people’s opinions, until she came to the place she accepted herself and realised she was good enough, just as she was. A very powerful conversation I want to encourage you to listen to.
I am going to finish this blog with my opinion. It is up to you whether you believe I have an opinion that is right for you and one you should pay attention to. My opinion is that you are good enough, just as you are, even if I don’t know you. I believe you are on this planet to do something amazing, and that you have the potential and capabilities to do far more than you are currently doing. By the way, I also believe this about myself. My opinion about you is that you should chase what is in your heart, no matter how unlikely or illogical it may seem. And whilst this may sound very biased, I believe it is the right opinion.
by admin | 13 Aug, 2022 | Andrew's Blog, Mindset
Why do we complicate things so much? Why is there so much doubt, fear, confusion, and anxiety? Why do we continually make things harder for ourselves than they need to be? What if there was an answer so simple that we could start immediately enjoying all the wonders that life has to offer? The great news is, there is an answer, and you already have it. To access this amazingly simple and powerful answer, all you have to do is ask the right question.
Did you know that when asked a question you answer it? Pretty obvious, right? The answer you give is based on the question asked. Whilst you can’t control the question that someone else asks you, you are in total control of the questions you ask yourself. This is great news because it means you can simply work backwards from what you want. Just identify the answer that you desire and then merely ask the question that will give you that answer.
If you want to be healthier and have more energy, the wrong question to ask is, why do I feel so terrible? If you ask that question, you will answer it and come up with all the reasons why you feel so bad. Guess where that will keep you? What if instead you asked, What can I do to increase my energy in a healthy way? The second you ask the question, you send your mind off on a seek and search mission, to find the answers to that question. Before you know it, amazing ideas will start coming to you to help you transform your health and energy. Then, all you have to do is act on those ideas. It really is that simple.
The greatest example of the power of this is demonstrated by the amazing Sean Bell, who is my guest on my latest podcast called, What if? This is a man who has just raised over $100,000 for the Make-a-Wish Foundation after running 4000km in 62 days from Cairns, Queensland, to Melbourne, Victoria. I don’t know about you, but if I were setting out on this overwhelming task, I think my mind would go to the wrong thoughts and questions. I am sure, I would be asking myself if I were insane! I know there would be doubts and limiting beliefs plaguing my mind. I asked Sean, how did you deal with the moments when you were struggling. He explained that he asked himself the questions that would give him the answers he wanted.
As he was going through a tough part of the run, he would ask himself, what if I could do this? How would that feel? These questions led his mind to the finish-line, as he ran across it. He imagined the feeling associated with that success. He visualised the people he would inspire as a result of finishing. He became excited about the impact his run would have on the Make-a-Wish Foundation. In the moment of that question, he re-committed himself to his task and ensured that the answer he got was the one he wanted.
Now, don’t get me wrong, there had to be adequate physical preparation and team support to help Sean reach his target. However, even with physical preparedness, many people still never achieve their desired result because they ask themselves the wrong question, which gives them the wrong answer. The first step in any success and achievement is getting the answer you want before you even get started. That will happen the moment you ask yourself the right questions.
In the moment that I decided to become a best-selling author, I had no time, no skills, no experience, no qualifications, and no idea what I was doing. So, how did it happen? It happened because of the answer I gave myself. Whilst it was an unlikely aspiration, it wasn’t impossible. I asked myself, is there any evidence to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that I could not become a best-selling author?The answer, no! Therefore, it meant it was possible, and so I visualised it done. I got to work and achieved the answer I expected.
As you move forward today and start working on the things you want in your life, would you like to remove any doubt that you can do it? Then, simply ask yourself questions about how you can get it done, and how it will feel when you do. The moment you start asking yourself the right questions, the answers you want will come to you. Then, all you have to do is get to work and create the amazing reality you want. Trust me, the answer is simple.
