Here are some facts about opinions. Everyone has them, everyone believes their own opinions, and rarely, if ever, are the opinions of different people about the same thing matching. The most important thing you need to understand about opinions is this, the ones you listen to and are influenced by will determine the outcomes in your life. So, make sure you listen to the right opinions.

So, which are the right opinions? In my mind it is very simple: the opinions that will lead me to what I want, no matter how unlikely or illogical that choice may seem. Would I be sitting here as a bestselling author had I listened to the ‘logical’ and ‘reasonable’ opinions of many other people? Not in a million years. I don’t know if my English teacher is still alive today, but if she is and knew that I was now a best-selling author, she would probably die from shock. If she is dead, I am sure she would turn over in her grave. I struggled to barely pass English in Year 12, with a lack of natural ability and interest. Had I asked for her opinion about me becoming an author, I can pretty much predict her words. They would have been logical, well presented and maybe even with some concern for my future, but would it have been the right opinion?

When I started to realise I didn’t want to live the life that education was leading to, that society was portraying, and that the ‘norm’ seemed to be living, I encountered many conflicting opinions regarding my choices. You may have discovered that already in your life. As I looked around the world and my own circle of associations, I saw people living a life that I didn’t want. Many were in careers they hated, and always stressed and cranky. Many were struggling with their health, weight, and energy. Many were living hand to mouth and only just surviving financially. As I looked at these people, I recognised two things. The first was that I did not want to live like them. The second was, if I listen to them, I will live like them. It was in that moment when I knew that I needed to be very careful about whose opinions I paid attention to.

It is incredible how people, including myself, are so attached to their opinions. Have you noticed that? If not, try to argue with someone you don’t agree with and see if it changes their mind. It is said that people convinced against their will are of the same opinion still. In other words, if someone has a conflicting opinion to yours, the chances are that it will never change. So, stop trying to change people, and instead avoid them if their opinions are contrary to what you want. I continually repeat this statement to myself, whenever someone tries to share their uninvited wisdom with me, If I listen to them, I will live like them. I then look at the life they are living and ask myself, is that what I want? If the answer is yes, I invite and open myself to their opinions. If the answer is no, I run from them as far and as fast as I can. Can I encourage you to do the same? If you really want what you want, that is.

So, the question remains, who has the right opinions? There is a group of people you know, or can find, who are those people for you. There are some important criteria that people must meet if they are to be on my trusted advisors list. First, they must genuinely and unconditionally want only the best for me, no insecurities or agendas. Second, they must be either living a life, or on the path to be living a life I want to emulate. Third, they must support and encourage my aspirations in a positive way, no matter how illogical or far-fetched they may be. Finally, they must challenge me to be better and hold me accountable to do what I need to do to have what I want. Anyone who does not fit this profile, is someone I will disengage from when they offer their opinion. It sounds harsh, but it is my life and I want it to be the best it can be. I am sure you want the same.

In my podcast this week, called Show up as you, I speak with Nikki Barry, who had to battle many demons and many people’s opinions, until she came to the place she accepted herself and realised she was good enough, just as she was. A very powerful conversation I want to encourage you to listen to.

I am going to finish this blog with my opinion. It is up to you whether you believe I have an opinion that is right for you and one you should pay attention to. My opinion is that you are good enough, just as you are, even if I don’t know you. I believe you are on this planet to do something amazing, and that you have the potential and capabilities to do far more than you are currently doing. By the way, I also believe this about myself. My opinion about you is that you should chase what is in your heart, no matter how unlikely or illogical it may seem. And whilst this may sound very biased, I believe it is the right opinion.