I recently had a wonderful conversation on podcast with Jonah Primo called Your philosophy, and as the names suggests, was wonderfully philosophical. The conversation started with Jonah talking about a funeral he had to attend, and we very quickly dived into this philosophical and reflective conversation. We both agreed it is not morbid or depressing to talk about death, in fact, the more we’re aware of our certain demise, the more likely we are to focus on the life we have.
I surprised myself when I came out with the statement as we were discussing how many people can find talking about death a negative and depressing topic. They even worry about when they may die. So, I said, the question is not when will we die, but when are we going to live? The reality is that every day we live is one which gets closer to our last, and I’ve spent too much of my life drifting through, watching the days pass without really focusing on living every single moment. So, in this week’s blog, I want to encourage you to ask yourself the question, if it’s not happening now, when am I going to really start living?
So, what does that mean?
That depends on what your definition of truly living a joyful life is, and what that life looks like. It also relies on you honestly evaluating the time you are spending right now, and whether you would consider it actually living, or just existing. For me, I know when I’m just existing because I feel more anxiety, I experience more stress, and things annoy me more than they normally would. For me, that means I don’t have a positive purpose or focus, and so I allow situations and circumstances to affect my moods and behaviors.
I know when I’m really living, and it has nothing to do with what I’m actually doing, but everything to do with how I’m feeling. I was asked in a podcast recently, with Steve Hodgson, what my definition of success is these days. For much of my life, that definition would be reliant on the achievement of some external goal. Whether that be, selection in the senior team, publishing a book, money in the bank, lifting a certain weight or running under a certain time, a business level attained, or some other external accomplishment. That is no longer what I aspire to.
Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy all those things. I am proud of my sporting, writing, health, and business achievements. And, I am still aspiring to create more in my life, however, it is no longer how I define success. These days for me, my definition of success is a feeling. When I have that feeling, I know I’m truly living. So, what is that feeling? When my eyes open in the morning, and it’s very early by the way, I know I’m living when my initial feeling is excitement, gratitude, and anticipation of a wonderful day. To me, that means I have exciting, purposeful, joyful, and wonderful things I’m working on. Whether that’s business related, in my personal life, or connected with contributing to the community in some way.
If I wake up with anxiety, stress, uncertainty, confusion, or other associated feelings, then I know I’m just existing and it’s an immediate trigger for me to reflect, reevaluate where I’m at, refocus and get back into purposeful living. If I am honest, this ebbs and flows, however these days I am much more aware and can get back to living very quickly. My question now is for you. Do you feel like you are living or just existing? Please take the time to reflect on and answer this question honestly. How do you feel when you wake up? Excited, grateful, and purposeful, or stressed, anxious, and tired? If it is the former, then keep living, and keep doing what you are doing. If it is the latter, then my next question is; are you ready to change it? Are you ready to start really living? What does that look and feel like for you? What do you need to stop doing and what do you get to start doing? Please take the time to answer these questions. We get one shot at life, so why not make it a cracker!
If you feel you need help in this area, please listen to my podcast with Jonah, and my other podcast this week with Mark Firehammer, called Who you think you are. If you still need more help, please reach out to me. Death is inevitable, existing is temporary, and living is a choice. Please make the choice to live every moment with joy, gratitude, and meaning, starting right now.