Did you know that all the answers to all the questions you have, problems you are facing or dreams you are aspiring to are right there waiting for you if you just ask for help? If you didn’t know that your life is about to change, if you just ask. If you did know that, and you are still wallowing in the mud and muck of life, why aren’t you just asking for help? This is a question I have asked myself for many years, until I finally slapped myself and said, get over yourself and your ego and ask. So, I did!

You may know I have a beautiful little female Maltese Shih Tzu named Joia. A couple of years ago, I had two of them, but sadly Mr Big passed away at the end of 2018. Whilst they were both the same breed, they were very different dogs. Mr Big was very stoic and good at hiding any discomfort or pain. In fact, he would often walk with a stone or burr in his paw without any fuss. It would often be luck that I would even find the foreign object and wonder how long he had put up with the discomfort, before I made the discovery.

Joia, on the other hand, is very different. In fact, it was just the other day she again demonstrated this difference. We were on our morning walk when, all of a sudden, she stopped, sat, lifted her paw and looked at me with the face of a fluffy angel. Her look said, please help me dad. I knew exactly what it was, because she had done it many times before. I went over to her, removed the burr from her paw, that was causing a mild discomfort, and off she trotted, a happy girl. She had no problem asking me to help her in the very instant she needed the help, Yet Mr Big never asked, he just put up with the discomfort. My question is, what discomfort are you putting up with that could be solved immediately if you just asked for help?

Joia, doesn’t care what I think about her and she doesn’t care if it is inconvenient for me. She wants what she wants, and she will ask for it, no matter the time of the day, or night. Yes, some nights, at 2 or 3am she will ask, in her special squeaky way, to go out for a wee. In my mind, it’s far better to get up and let her out than clean up the doggy mess in the morning. Why is it that we – and by we, I am definitely including myself here – have so much trouble asking for help, when the solution may be as simple as removing a burr or opening a door?

I made a decision a while ago that I don’t want to live a life pretending everything is okay when, actually, I was not at all comfortable. I was not loving what I was doing day to day. I was not comfortable with the financial position I was in. I was not enjoying the stress and anxiety that came with living a life far short of what I believed it could be. I got to the point when I realised that what I knew had gotten me to where I was, and it definitely wasn’t awesome. I also knew that if I wanted a different outcome, I would need to borrow someone else’s brain to help me achieve it. How do you borrow someone else’s brain? You ask them for help, that’s what you do.

Do you know what? When you ask, you will receive. I found people who were happy to help me, and all I had to do was ask. The end result of overcoming my ego and perceived weakness, then admitting I don’t have all the answers and just asking for help, my life changed. It changed quickly! Back in 2004, just after I had published my first book, Eat Chocolate, Drink Alcohol and be Lean & Healthy, I wanted to be retired from my 15 year and 80-hour per week personal training career and be a full-time author. I was in a lot of debt at the time and had no idea of how I could do it. Well, after asking for help, learning some new skills and applying them, in 2006, I retired from personal training and have been a full-time author, speaker, mentor and life-lover ever since. The answer, my friend, just ask for help!

In the most incredible conversation I had with Petrea King on my podcast this week called, Weep the tears, I was so inspired by a lady committed to helping anyone who would simply ask. Her Quest for Life Foundation helps thousands of people every year deal with trauma, if only they are willing to have the courage to ask. Do you have the courage?

What are you struggling with at the moment? What are you trying to change with the same brain that got you to point you knew you needed to change in the first place? Do you want to stay struggling and uncomfortable? Do you want to keep living a life short of what is possible for you? Depending on how you answered those questions, I would have to say the one thing that will change everything for you, if that’s what you want, is to… just ask! Someone else has done what you want to do, is living the life you want to live and is achieving things you want to achieve. The great news is that they would love to help you, or at least point you in the right direction, if you just ask.