We humans are a unique race, aren’t we? Have you, like me, ever done something you knew would lead to an undesired outcome, but did it anyway? Have you, like me, ever done the same thing over and over again and actually expected a different result? Have you, like me, ever followed a conditioned response just to be disappointed again? Have you, like me, ever followed societal norms only to end up wishing you had taken a different path? If so, are you ready for the answer to all your dilemmas? It’s simple, do the opposite.
Do the opposite of what? The opposite of what you deep down know will lead you to the same old predictable and disappointing outcome. You know criticizing will damage a relationship, don’t you? So, do the opposite and give praise and encouragement. You know eating another donut will not enhance your wellbeing, right? So, do the opposite and eat something that will. You know spending money unnecessarily will empty your bank account, agreed? So, do the opposite and save. Are you getting my point?
I like being right, but I have never won an argument, have you? It’s a no-win situation, because even if you do prove another person wrong, you have damaged the relationship. If they prove you wrong, then resentment kicks in. I know this, in both cases, from personal experience. Do you know what I do now when something says something I know is not right? The opposite of what I used to do. I agree with them. You may be asking, how can you agree with them when you know they are wrong? Simple, because in their mind they are correct and me proving them wrong does nothing constructive at all.
The snooze button used to be my best friend. How is it that every night you go to bed, your best intentions are to get up and exercise the next morning, and then wake up with a very different feeling? In fact, not only were my intentions great, but I was excited to get up at 5am and get my training done. But then, whilst I slept, my body was invaded by the evil lazy-bad-attitude spirit. The alarm would go off and my excitement had turned to anxiety, and my motivation to mush! I would hit the snooze button time and time again. Then one day, as I realised my fitness level was declining and the rolls on my stomach multiplying, I decided to do the opposite the next time my alarm went off. I did, I got up and trained. It took a while to create the habit, but now I never miss a day.
Debt is a good indicator that your money habits are not great. I have been in debt more times than I would like to disclose in this blog. There was no secret to my debt, I was making very poor choices about how I spent my money. I will give you one very embarrassing example. I got a large sum of money as an inheritance which would have been far better invested. Instead, to feed my very fragile and hungry ego at the time, I went and bought an $80,000 car. About a year later, I realized that a car was not my answer to happiness and decided to sell it. I sold it for $40,000. That my friend, is a poor financial decision. Now I do the opposite. I earn more than I spend, and I make much better financial decisions.
Do I have to keep giving you my personal and embarrassing examples? I don’t think so. I am grateful I have learned so much about doing the opposite of what I used to do and what many people do. Why? Simple, because I want different results in my life. I am guessing, if you are reading this blog, you would also like something to change in your life. If that is true, then you only need to do one thing, in the area of life you want to see change. That is, the opposite. If you want to be fitter, do the opposite of being sedentary, and be active. If you want to improve your relationships, do the opposite of not talking, and talk. If you want to create better results in your business, do the opposite of procrastinating, and take action. You may have heard the saying that, seeing is believing. If you want to see great things in your life, try doing the opposite which suggests, believing is seeing. It’s really pretty simple, wouldn’t you agree?
In my podcast this week with Kim Mellor, called Bring the sunshine, you will be incredibly inspired. Coming out of a history of domestic violence, becoming a single mother in her teens, and then finding herself and her two children homeless, it would have been very easy for her to spiral. Instead, she did the opposite and started bringing sunshine everywhere she went. Everything in life offers a choice. The choices we make will determine the life we ultimately live. So, my friend, if you want a life different to the one you are living then simply, do the opposite.